I'm down at the Blind Beggar where, amongst a great many other things, I blog political news for their groundbreaking and wildly successful newsletter; "Beggar Blast". It's a Sunday, there's a band named "Double Ds and the B.J." up on stage and I'm drinking a coffee absolutely drenched in at least three types of booze. And trying to get my head around it all. The Obama victory. "Why not write it up for our groundbreaking and wildly successful newsletter," Pat advises me, after I yammered about it to him non-stop over a very decent soup. Like I have a choice to write about the thing but Pat is good about giving me a deadline to utterly bust and drag around with me. A topic this time as well, though I’d already assigned it to myself, had been writing about it for a few years now.
Getting drunk. With fun new friends that can possibly teach me guitar. Being served big frothy beers by some very unique and sexy girls. Gained a scribe along the way, which is invaluable to a blogger on the run who’s usually ripped when his best work gurgles up from the primordial ooze. But only when the background music ain’t loud and my scribe can actually hear me, which is seldom in this joint, which means you gotta grab a piece of ‘puter whenever you can and fire out what blasts there be. Because the moment has to be encapsulated. And this is not just a moment. It’s a Moment. Know what I’m saying? I’m betting you do.
What does the Obama victory mean? To me? The culmination of years of writing vicious and cynical diatribes against a land of fools ruled by monsters, an American dream turned to nightmare, a world powerless but to sit back and watch a once noble country eat itself alive. Suffice it to say, it got ugly for a while there. Real ugly. So ugly the temptation is to pull it all out and explore it once more, call out those evil jackdogs and pirates just one more time because it’s what you’re used to, man! It’s what you feel strangely comfortable doing. And why not?
Lemme get it out of my system: George ‘Dubya’ Bush is actually a moron. A swaggering, snickering, half-retarded hick that broke almost anything worth breaking and within reach. And lied obvious lies about it. And didn’t really give a shit about it. And probably never will. That even red-meat Republicans seem ready to embrace this otherwise universally accepted truth is all the evidence you’ll ever need. George Dubya Bush is less like a presidential figure and more like a character in a sitcom. Like an evil Balki Bartacamus. He is a buffoon and often seems more interested in talking about what he’s had to eat that day then pressing matters of global concern. I could go on. Forever.
Point is, how can you talk about the Obama victory without talkin’ bout Bush? The Bush presidency was the end of the old ways. It brought every corrupt and filthy detail of how business goes down in the Halls of High Power to the forefront where even the American Idol crowd ever so slowly realized something was rotten in the land of the Free and Brave: criminals were at large and in charge. And it was funny at first, until countries got invaded, levvies started breaking, people started dying and global economies started crashing.
What can I say? From thence came Obama. Yeah. Guy talking straight about the whole thing. Saw him first at the Democratic National Convention in 2004, the brightest light of a party about to lose what should have been a no-brainer of an election. That’s what you get for nominating a largish chunk of wood for your presidential nominee. I won’t go into it. This is about ‘Bama, who was basically a total unknown in ’04 that went out there and laid down the thunder on that crowd and said it like it was and blew the socks off of anybody that heard him, including this lil’ blogger from Up North. Made me turn down the cynicism for a while and just listen. Which doesn’t happen a whole lot to us hardened, political blogger types. Almost never.
Second time I saw him was maybe six months later when he was being interviewed by Charlie Rose and I sat and listened to the 30 minute interview. Thinking oh man, if only you could get elected. Jesus H. Christ, just imagine it. Guy knows exactly what’s going on out there and has vision and may even be one those ‘Great Men’ that America produces now and again. And right then and right there I felt he had a shot at it. What he was saying struck a chord and I felt that a fella slingin’ truths in this time of very obvious and almost universal deception could maybe do quite well for himself. Especially as the obviousness just keeps getting obviouser. "Never happen," I said aloud to a messy kitchen, "they’d kill him if he ever got serious. Too bad." And went about my day. Even then just a little bit hopeful at what I’d seen.
Reflecting on the moment, I make a shooter of tonic and beef from my sandwich (that I’m told I swore at, which is weird) and have it sent to Pat. I’ve done this only twice before. We haven’t spoken about it since and may never. My scribe returns with his comely lady-friend and described to me a transcendental moment of mercy surrounding a sluggish fly and his sneaker whilst taking a dump and the whole time I’m trying to figure out what to do with my truck. I’m s’posed to stay at the bartender’s place tonight but can’t because my brother’s nailing her and I’m certain the sheets are glazed. I’d rather sleep on the floor, which, I’m told, is probably no better. Hey, am I gonna get in trouble for this stuff? What are the rules here? And where was I? Shit.
In late March of ’07, long before he’d announced his candidacy I had the following to say about America’s next president:
"the question in my mind is not whether he is the best candidate for ’08 but rather if America deserves him. And if they can elect him without killing him."
A very ugly caveat now echoed by almost anyone I talk to: "If they don’t kill him," they say. And people have a point. Abe Lincoln took a double-tap to the back of the head in a theatre. JFK was slain in the back of a convertible on a sunny day by more than one gun. Martin Luther King was killed outside his hotel room and he knew it was coming and had already accepted it. What I’m saying is America kills its great men. Which means George Bush’ll probably live forever. But Bama?
This is where I’m powerless but to delve into that strange realm that I find myself returning to now and again in my own personal odyssey, a realm where all my Science and my Logic and my Reason flies the coop because for a few seconds at least there’s something more powerful driving the whole show. It’s something that says relax, Sense. It’s not supposed to be like that. You haven’t gone through all that, caught a glimpse of the Sublime and the Greatness only to see a Great man’s head explode in a crimson mist, a return to crime, deceit and universal ugliness. As awful as we can be, we can be also great. Both sides of the binary exist within each of us and therefore collectively. Maybe I’m nuts. Certainly I’m nuts but hey, prove me wrong. You can’t. You can only prove me right.
Maybe sounds weird coming from a dude like me but that realm is a Faith in something much larger and greater than we can ever possibly fully understand. And you can call it Jesus or Allah or the Great Gazoo, I guess, so long as I can call it the Universe and we can all just agree to disagree and be done with it. But the point of the Faith angle is that sometimes you just have to believe. And I believe it’s time for greatness again. From even us Canadians. But that’s a whole other blog.
A ‘Bama victory is the triumph of Reason. Over Fear and Idiocy. Over mindless patriotic chestbeating and cheerleading and the denial of simple Truths. It’s an about-face, as in the whole ship turns around and goes back in the exact opposite direction, away from the Abyss and just in the nick of goddamned time. That’s what Obama stands for, that’s what the American people chose and the whole thing leaves me in a kind of pleasant shock. And there’s this Hope thing. You feel it too? I think maybe you do.
Anywho, they chose and they chose wisely. An Obama victory. That’s the first snippet of what it means to me. How far can it go? Maybe that’s a whole other blog. But a few years ago I started writing something that I’ve never stopped writing and the raw thrust of it is that I felt the whole world was on the cusp of massive impending change, one way or the other. It’s a Transcend or End kind of trip and nothing that’s happened since has proved me wrong. A vote for Obama was a vote to rise above the sludge and the crap and hatred and the fear and to think about what we can actually do with all our technology and smarts and internets and whatnot. The polar opposite of an Apocalypse has in the past been referred to as a Renaissance, which it may well be, if this cat’s the real deal and I’m certain he is. All of which is also a whole other blog. At the very least.
Peace, friends. And tip your waitresses.
Showing posts with label Election 2008. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Election 2008. Show all posts
Sunday, December 28, 2008
Republican Reckoning: the Rise and Fall of Sarah Palin
Sun Sep 28, 2008 at 09:20:13 AM PST
"She makes George W. Bush sound like Cicero"
-Former Palin cheerleader and Right wing hack, Rod Dreher
The Republican Convention was a magical land where desperate people could say whatever they wanted, where nobody actually believed them but everybody applauded and sheds tears like it was the bestest most truthiest tidbit they ever heard. Why? Because every single person in that hall shared collectively in the Great Desperation. Every single tenant of their ideology they’d held so close to their red, white and blue breasts had had all the opportunity to work out for themselves, in the last eight years more than ever. What more can you ask for than a Red-Meat Holy-Rolling Oil-Man Republican Executive and a Republican dominated Congress? Like never before the Party had all the opportunity in the world to show once and for all the supremacy of their beliefs and leadership, and what’s the status of their America come Election Time, 2008? In the toilet, in so many ways I won’t bother to list them. You’re either paying attention or you’re not.
Anyways, from thence came Palin.
From thence came Palin, and so the Desperate Folk rallied and gathered and slavered and slobbered, gobbling hideous lies by the fist-full and furiously chanting "DRILL, DRILL, DRILL!" until tears poured from their eyes. But their new champion had arrived in the not unpleasing form of a moose-killing, lipstick-wearing pitbull/hockey-mom/Reagen in a skirt/beauty contest winner. And she gave a speech. "Hot damn!" exclaimed many the conservative commentator that night and in the 24 hour media cycles to come, "did she give a barn-burner of a speech!" She gave a barn-burning, game-changing holy hell of a speech that brought back the all the joy and triumph of being a Republican again! Ooooh those Leftie loonies were gonna get it! Ever skinned a polar bear, Hillary? HAH!!!
And how they basked in her genius, the glory that was Wasilla mayor Sarah Palin on that night. How could they not? She was going to change the way Washington worked, while making no mention of the fact that it was those very people in that very room and their peers around the country that are in charge of working Washington, (and Wall Street, it turns out) precisely the way it was! It was like Sassy Sarah had somehow gave them all this huge gift of both assuaging their guilt for their recently toileted America and never hinting anyone oughta take responsibility for it and to certainly not change one bit about the way they do business and make money. As obvious a lie as you’ll ever get but not for these people and not in this magical land. It would be the highlight of her political career, a moment where she didn’t walk nor ran but soared above the heads of all who watched. It would never get that good again.
From thence came Palin. Gave her speech on a Friday and by Monday we’d heard whiff of not one, not two but three different emerging scandals from either her time as mayor of Wasilla or outrageous, demonstrable lies from her slowly moldering speech. "I did a buncha things I didn’t really do," became the real upshot of that speech and by the end of the day Monday all sorts of bets circulated the internet involving the likelihood of Palin having to step down. Certainly there was brief respite when McCain gained a post-convention bounce in the polls from that magnificent speech of hers but from then on things just got worse and worse for Sarah Palin (to say nothing of the McCain campaign). Turned out one hell of a speech was all she had in her.
McCain and his crew were quick enough to spot it. It was opening weekend and she was America’s new darling and didn’t we all tune into our favorite Sunday morning talk shows to get another glimpse of this plucky beauty, another dose of this foxy frontierswoman talking trash inre the Democrats and promising the change the whole Universe seemed to need at that moment? But where was she? No interviews? Reeeeeeally? Not the whole next week, even? Not taking questions from anybody? Ugly thoughts began to rumble through the guts of the Desperate People like bad coffee. And rightfully so.
It was well established that she hadn’t been vetted at all, what if she can’t handle an interview, even a question? What if McCain (who many of them had never liked anyway and was running his campaign like...well...a 72 year-old man) had done the unthinkable and chosen a scandal-ridden, unknown airhead as a running mate? If this were shown to be the case then the Desperate would become something they had arguably always been but never been forced to admit, something somehow even worse than desperate: Reckless. And Foolish.
She had three (but really two) interviews and each was a disaster in its own way. Turned out that when she wandered too far from the talking points she came off as something of an idiot, a hard-trying child that would just barf out unconnected words when answering questions she was supposed to know but didn’t. One Kossack described this phenomena as a ‘word-salad.’ ‘Utter disaster’ probably works just as well.
It got to the point that even the Democrats and the far Left started to feel bad watching the Republican vice-standard-bearer muddle her way in, out and around not just one but nearly any question she got. Sure, it was a hoot at first but there was no joy in Mudville by her third (but really second) outing in the News. There was little sport in it for even the most hardest of bloggers when she launched verbal diarreah all over fellow chowder-head Katie Couric, who I also felt sorry for, for the first time ever.
What a moment. Imagine it: you discover your interviewee is a complete and utter kumquat and it’s kind of your duty as a journalist to expose that to the world, given that she’s one nearly-octagenerian-hearbeat away from the Presidency of the United States of America and thus, the World (well, not anymore but that’s a whole other blog). And in that brief moment you’re enshrined in history alongside the biggest political faceplant ever. Couric, for her part, didn’t test her too heavily because she didn’t have to. You either know how to play the bagpipes or you don’t. For a politician, it was becoming more and more clear to all and sundry, Palin was one hell of a moosegutter.
You wanted her and would-be Emperor McCainus to go down in flames but somehow...not like that? You know? Republicans may get pleasure out of completely crushing the souls of their opponent, stripping them of all dignity and laughing great belly laughs for decades about it but Democrats, it will be shown, have little stomach for such things and would rather look to the future. Politically, it may be their biggest weakness or their greatest strength. History will be the judge of that also. But I digress.
From thence came Palin. She was a shooting star. Now she’s dust. A National joke. Republican roadkill. What will she be remembered for? Her folksy chatter, sass and physical beauty will perhaps be missed by some. She’ll be fodder for the Democrats and other stand-up comedians for years to come. Most Republicans will wince at the mere mention of her name, perhaps reflecting upon their own humiliating moments where they’d desperately defended this muddle-headed chipmunk as the new savior of the Republican party and perfectly able to step up and take the reigns should her ancient crocodile of a ‘running mate’ fall face-first into his presidential cheerios. To the smart ones she’ll be the Republican’s reckoning, that final, undeniable realization that everything they ever knew or thought they knew were necessarily not so. And that they too had to change.
"She makes George W. Bush sound like Cicero"
-Former Palin cheerleader and Right wing hack, Rod Dreher
The Republican Convention was a magical land where desperate people could say whatever they wanted, where nobody actually believed them but everybody applauded and sheds tears like it was the bestest most truthiest tidbit they ever heard. Why? Because every single person in that hall shared collectively in the Great Desperation. Every single tenant of their ideology they’d held so close to their red, white and blue breasts had had all the opportunity to work out for themselves, in the last eight years more than ever. What more can you ask for than a Red-Meat Holy-Rolling Oil-Man Republican Executive and a Republican dominated Congress? Like never before the Party had all the opportunity in the world to show once and for all the supremacy of their beliefs and leadership, and what’s the status of their America come Election Time, 2008? In the toilet, in so many ways I won’t bother to list them. You’re either paying attention or you’re not.
Anyways, from thence came Palin.
From thence came Palin, and so the Desperate Folk rallied and gathered and slavered and slobbered, gobbling hideous lies by the fist-full and furiously chanting "DRILL, DRILL, DRILL!" until tears poured from their eyes. But their new champion had arrived in the not unpleasing form of a moose-killing, lipstick-wearing pitbull/hockey-mom/Reagen in a skirt/beauty contest winner. And she gave a speech. "Hot damn!" exclaimed many the conservative commentator that night and in the 24 hour media cycles to come, "did she give a barn-burner of a speech!" She gave a barn-burning, game-changing holy hell of a speech that brought back the all the joy and triumph of being a Republican again! Ooooh those Leftie loonies were gonna get it! Ever skinned a polar bear, Hillary? HAH!!!
And how they basked in her genius, the glory that was Wasilla mayor Sarah Palin on that night. How could they not? She was going to change the way Washington worked, while making no mention of the fact that it was those very people in that very room and their peers around the country that are in charge of working Washington, (and Wall Street, it turns out) precisely the way it was! It was like Sassy Sarah had somehow gave them all this huge gift of both assuaging their guilt for their recently toileted America and never hinting anyone oughta take responsibility for it and to certainly not change one bit about the way they do business and make money. As obvious a lie as you’ll ever get but not for these people and not in this magical land. It would be the highlight of her political career, a moment where she didn’t walk nor ran but soared above the heads of all who watched. It would never get that good again.
From thence came Palin. Gave her speech on a Friday and by Monday we’d heard whiff of not one, not two but three different emerging scandals from either her time as mayor of Wasilla or outrageous, demonstrable lies from her slowly moldering speech. "I did a buncha things I didn’t really do," became the real upshot of that speech and by the end of the day Monday all sorts of bets circulated the internet involving the likelihood of Palin having to step down. Certainly there was brief respite when McCain gained a post-convention bounce in the polls from that magnificent speech of hers but from then on things just got worse and worse for Sarah Palin (to say nothing of the McCain campaign). Turned out one hell of a speech was all she had in her.
McCain and his crew were quick enough to spot it. It was opening weekend and she was America’s new darling and didn’t we all tune into our favorite Sunday morning talk shows to get another glimpse of this plucky beauty, another dose of this foxy frontierswoman talking trash inre the Democrats and promising the change the whole Universe seemed to need at that moment? But where was she? No interviews? Reeeeeeally? Not the whole next week, even? Not taking questions from anybody? Ugly thoughts began to rumble through the guts of the Desperate People like bad coffee. And rightfully so.
It was well established that she hadn’t been vetted at all, what if she can’t handle an interview, even a question? What if McCain (who many of them had never liked anyway and was running his campaign like...well...a 72 year-old man) had done the unthinkable and chosen a scandal-ridden, unknown airhead as a running mate? If this were shown to be the case then the Desperate would become something they had arguably always been but never been forced to admit, something somehow even worse than desperate: Reckless. And Foolish.
She had three (but really two) interviews and each was a disaster in its own way. Turned out that when she wandered too far from the talking points she came off as something of an idiot, a hard-trying child that would just barf out unconnected words when answering questions she was supposed to know but didn’t. One Kossack described this phenomena as a ‘word-salad.’ ‘Utter disaster’ probably works just as well.
It got to the point that even the Democrats and the far Left started to feel bad watching the Republican vice-standard-bearer muddle her way in, out and around not just one but nearly any question she got. Sure, it was a hoot at first but there was no joy in Mudville by her third (but really second) outing in the News. There was little sport in it for even the most hardest of bloggers when she launched verbal diarreah all over fellow chowder-head Katie Couric, who I also felt sorry for, for the first time ever.
What a moment. Imagine it: you discover your interviewee is a complete and utter kumquat and it’s kind of your duty as a journalist to expose that to the world, given that she’s one nearly-octagenerian-hearbeat away from the Presidency of the United States of America and thus, the World (well, not anymore but that’s a whole other blog). And in that brief moment you’re enshrined in history alongside the biggest political faceplant ever. Couric, for her part, didn’t test her too heavily because she didn’t have to. You either know how to play the bagpipes or you don’t. For a politician, it was becoming more and more clear to all and sundry, Palin was one hell of a moosegutter.
You wanted her and would-be Emperor McCainus to go down in flames but somehow...not like that? You know? Republicans may get pleasure out of completely crushing the souls of their opponent, stripping them of all dignity and laughing great belly laughs for decades about it but Democrats, it will be shown, have little stomach for such things and would rather look to the future. Politically, it may be their biggest weakness or their greatest strength. History will be the judge of that also. But I digress.
From thence came Palin. She was a shooting star. Now she’s dust. A National joke. Republican roadkill. What will she be remembered for? Her folksy chatter, sass and physical beauty will perhaps be missed by some. She’ll be fodder for the Democrats and other stand-up comedians for years to come. Most Republicans will wince at the mere mention of her name, perhaps reflecting upon their own humiliating moments where they’d desperately defended this muddle-headed chipmunk as the new savior of the Republican party and perfectly able to step up and take the reigns should her ancient crocodile of a ‘running mate’ fall face-first into his presidential cheerios. To the smart ones she’ll be the Republican’s reckoning, that final, undeniable realization that everything they ever knew or thought they knew were necessarily not so. And that they too had to change.
Obama-Biden '08
Tue Aug 19, 2008 at 04:46:37 PM PST
At what point to political speculations go beyond mere amusement and bet-fodder to outright spooky? It’s one thing to have predicted Obama to take the nomination nearly a year before he throws his hat in the ring but that’s nothing next to predicting McCain in early December of ’07 (in the now epic The Republican Candidates are the Most Unelectable Gang of Freaks in American History). But then to go on and nail down Senator Joe Biden as Bama’s Veep in late May of this year? I know what you’re saying: who is this iSenseChange and how is he so dead-on-balls accurate for this election? How can we reward this latter-day NeoNostradamus for the sheer prescience involved in these utterly uncanny picks of his? What glorious accolades can we lay at his freshly oiled feet, what leafy laurels around his surely massive skull? Judging from the lackluster response to my admittedly weird entries thus far, I’m guessing a handful of reads and less than ten comments. Half of which are my own. Fuck it, says I. Ignore me at your peril. I am the Kossack Kreskin. And I have massive nuts.
That’s right, I said it: massive. But enough on that. Couldn’t believe Kos’d choose Kerry over Biden. Why not choose a largish chunk of wood instead? Look Kos, I like Kerry, think he’s a good dude but it’s already very well established that he’s about as exciting to listen to as a largish chunk of wood. Not to mention (yet mentioning) he was a limp dick at defending himself against some of the most obviously trumped up hack charges in history. Former Vietnam war hero gets trashed for being, well...a Vietnam war hero? Next to former cheerleader and just-barely-there-if-there-at-all National Guardsman George ‘Dubya’ Bush? Kerry’s your attack dog, Kos? What on earth for?
And sure, there’s always Hillary. If you’re freakin’ nuts. I believe I might have mentioned this before but it’s my position that Bama’d be smarter to eat his own face off than put that woman in the ol’ one-heartbeat-away-from-the-presidency spot. Do it and your next appointment better be a royal taster. Seriously. A hired geek to taste all your food before you do. Don’t pretend you don’t know what I’m talking about.
And of course Edwards. Whom I was cheering for to win the whole thing for a little while there due to a populist message that struck a chord within me: it’s going to be a fight to get the corporate greedheads to play something even remotely close to fair! Well, so much for Edwards. Ever. Cheats on his own cancer-ridden wife. But she was in remission! Jesus H. Suffering Christ on Crab Cakes. Decides to run for President anyways. Knowing full well that if it just happened to come out after he was nominated he’d effectively toasted the Democrats chances for what should be the biggest no-brainer election in American history. To say nothing (and yet saying it) of gift-wrapping the presidency for another neocon, the ramifications of which the entire freaking world would have to suffer. What a dick! Elizabeth too. Cancer victims, it turns out, can still be dicks. I’ll never, ever apologize for saying it. Anybody who knew and didn’t tackle him to the ground or hire somebody to tackle him to the ground rather than run for president is a dick or a double agent. Period. I show better judgment every single day I don’t jerk at work. Which, I’m proud to report, is the wide majority of days.
But it’s coming down to the nut of the thing, the Veep sweepstakes are coming to a close and it looks like Biden’s surpassed all comers and will be Bama’s veep. He’s an excellent choice for a host of blatantly obvious reasons but there’s only one reason he’s The Choice: in 2008 it’s less about what states a Veep can deliver and more about how he comes off on mainstream media outlets like CNN and whatnot. Because they shape the dialogue. Plain and simple. And he’s a freaking treat to watch. His comments get play because they’re genuinely funny or extremely well informed. His Giuliani-911 quip goes down in history as the second coolest one-liner of the entire campaign.
And the first thing they always do is ask him about whatever the latest global problem is and here’s the thing: gotcha reporting, obvious propaganda and narrative manipulation temporarily disappear and genuine journalistic curiosity oh-so temporarily takes over for even a twittering half-wit like Chris Matthews and you know why? Because these media hacks are genuinely interested in what he has to say in spite of themselves. Because Biden actually knows what the fuck is really going on. He knows! And then they go and ask him about whatever the Repuggie freaks are trying sling around and Biden comes off as above it, disgusted yet slightly amused by it and then gives them the full low-down in a language everybody can very easily understand.
Biden’s very likable yet he can launch raw fire and reeking brimstone when he feels the need and in this campaign, friends and neighbors? There’s need. Oh yes, there’s need. You need someone who can snicker at the obvious hackery and utterly torch some of the more uglier stuff that’s no doubt coming. Biden is that guy. Period.
Obama-Biden in ’08, Kossacks! Get used to it!
-iSC
p.p. other Kossacks that posted a Biden prediction as their #1 pick for Veep earlier than mine please drop me a line and a link and I’ll come check you out.
At what point to political speculations go beyond mere amusement and bet-fodder to outright spooky? It’s one thing to have predicted Obama to take the nomination nearly a year before he throws his hat in the ring but that’s nothing next to predicting McCain in early December of ’07 (in the now epic The Republican Candidates are the Most Unelectable Gang of Freaks in American History). But then to go on and nail down Senator Joe Biden as Bama’s Veep in late May of this year? I know what you’re saying: who is this iSenseChange and how is he so dead-on-balls accurate for this election? How can we reward this latter-day NeoNostradamus for the sheer prescience involved in these utterly uncanny picks of his? What glorious accolades can we lay at his freshly oiled feet, what leafy laurels around his surely massive skull? Judging from the lackluster response to my admittedly weird entries thus far, I’m guessing a handful of reads and less than ten comments. Half of which are my own. Fuck it, says I. Ignore me at your peril. I am the Kossack Kreskin. And I have massive nuts.
That’s right, I said it: massive. But enough on that. Couldn’t believe Kos’d choose Kerry over Biden. Why not choose a largish chunk of wood instead? Look Kos, I like Kerry, think he’s a good dude but it’s already very well established that he’s about as exciting to listen to as a largish chunk of wood. Not to mention (yet mentioning) he was a limp dick at defending himself against some of the most obviously trumped up hack charges in history. Former Vietnam war hero gets trashed for being, well...a Vietnam war hero? Next to former cheerleader and just-barely-there-if-there-at-all National Guardsman George ‘Dubya’ Bush? Kerry’s your attack dog, Kos? What on earth for?
And sure, there’s always Hillary. If you’re freakin’ nuts. I believe I might have mentioned this before but it’s my position that Bama’d be smarter to eat his own face off than put that woman in the ol’ one-heartbeat-away-from-the-presidency spot. Do it and your next appointment better be a royal taster. Seriously. A hired geek to taste all your food before you do. Don’t pretend you don’t know what I’m talking about.
And of course Edwards. Whom I was cheering for to win the whole thing for a little while there due to a populist message that struck a chord within me: it’s going to be a fight to get the corporate greedheads to play something even remotely close to fair! Well, so much for Edwards. Ever. Cheats on his own cancer-ridden wife. But she was in remission! Jesus H. Suffering Christ on Crab Cakes. Decides to run for President anyways. Knowing full well that if it just happened to come out after he was nominated he’d effectively toasted the Democrats chances for what should be the biggest no-brainer election in American history. To say nothing (and yet saying it) of gift-wrapping the presidency for another neocon, the ramifications of which the entire freaking world would have to suffer. What a dick! Elizabeth too. Cancer victims, it turns out, can still be dicks. I’ll never, ever apologize for saying it. Anybody who knew and didn’t tackle him to the ground or hire somebody to tackle him to the ground rather than run for president is a dick or a double agent. Period. I show better judgment every single day I don’t jerk at work. Which, I’m proud to report, is the wide majority of days.
But it’s coming down to the nut of the thing, the Veep sweepstakes are coming to a close and it looks like Biden’s surpassed all comers and will be Bama’s veep. He’s an excellent choice for a host of blatantly obvious reasons but there’s only one reason he’s The Choice: in 2008 it’s less about what states a Veep can deliver and more about how he comes off on mainstream media outlets like CNN and whatnot. Because they shape the dialogue. Plain and simple. And he’s a freaking treat to watch. His comments get play because they’re genuinely funny or extremely well informed. His Giuliani-911 quip goes down in history as the second coolest one-liner of the entire campaign.
And the first thing they always do is ask him about whatever the latest global problem is and here’s the thing: gotcha reporting, obvious propaganda and narrative manipulation temporarily disappear and genuine journalistic curiosity oh-so temporarily takes over for even a twittering half-wit like Chris Matthews and you know why? Because these media hacks are genuinely interested in what he has to say in spite of themselves. Because Biden actually knows what the fuck is really going on. He knows! And then they go and ask him about whatever the Repuggie freaks are trying sling around and Biden comes off as above it, disgusted yet slightly amused by it and then gives them the full low-down in a language everybody can very easily understand.
Biden’s very likable yet he can launch raw fire and reeking brimstone when he feels the need and in this campaign, friends and neighbors? There’s need. Oh yes, there’s need. You need someone who can snicker at the obvious hackery and utterly torch some of the more uglier stuff that’s no doubt coming. Biden is that guy. Period.
Obama-Biden in ’08, Kossacks! Get used to it!
-iSC
p.p. other Kossacks that posted a Biden prediction as their #1 pick for Veep earlier than mine please drop me a line and a link and I’ll come check you out.
Your 2008 Vice Presidential Short-List Hotlist
Sat May 24, 2008 at 11:43:55 AM PST
Alternatively: Obama Would be Smarter to Eat His Own Face than Pick Hillary Clinton for V.P.
As opposed to whatever you'd say Cheney's doing, in your far more traditional ‘top-down' styled administrations your VP really has one function and one function alone: Get your Presidential nominee elected. The flipside of which being some kind of cause-no-harm/don't-fuck-up kinda thing, which changes little once actually elected. That having been said and with out further ado I hereby present your 2008 Vice Presidential Short-List
Cutting edge (and still totally FREE!!!) political analysis and predictions below the fold.
THIS JUST IN!!!: alot of talk about Wes Clark (which I find unfathomable), Gore (unlikely he'd go for it), Sibelius is coming up alot, there's some good points on Kaine and there's an awful lot of Edwards talk...
*
NOT HILLARY CLINTON:
If Obama makes Hillary his veep I will gleefully admit I know absolutely nothing about politics and from that very moment will give up blogging forever. Take up gardening or something. Seriously. Because picking Hillary would be the biggest mistake of Bama’s political career whether he won the presidency or not. Especially if he won it! Jesus H!! He wouldn't wish it on his worst enemy, which, at this phase, may well be...Hillary Clinton?
She’s working the same Whitehouse as you? One heartbeat away, as they say? And she’s supposed to do what you tell her to? Facilitate your goals and strategies? Make your vision happen for you, even in the extremely likely event that the two of you disagree? Really?!? Are you kidding me? ‘Bama’s not insane and that’s what you’d have to be to handpick as your VP anybody, any creature of such raw, naked ambition and utter disregard for the basic Rules of Operation.
Hillary as Bama's VP is a preposterous, unthinkable idea and Obama knows it better than anybody on earth with the possible exception of Bill Clinton, who of course recommended it anyways. It will never, ever happen. We must move on and I’m exceptionally happy to.
JOHN EDWARDS:
I’m an Edwards fan but here’s why you don’t pick him as your VP: because he’s already had a shot at it and been a part of a losing election. It didn’t work out for the last guy and you don’t want to associate yourself with the utter misery that was the 2004 Presidential Elections, even peripherally. It’s not fair to him but it is that way. He’d far better serve you as one of the finest Attorneys General that America has ever seen.
BILL RICHARDSON:
Jesus, I hate to say it but here we go anyways: The Black guy picks a Latin guy when Race is already an issue in the nomination, when Billy Hayseed of the Deep South already has reservations enough?
Nope. Never happen. "There’s right and there’s wrong and there’s politics," one asshole said to another. Not fair to Richardson neither but there it is. Oter than that Rcihardson's principle characteristic is that he's a nice guy which Obama seems to already have sewn up quite...nicely. Ahem. And sure, there's some Foreign Policy advantages to choosing Richardson but if that's the qualifier in your VP selection do you choose Richradson or somebody else? You choose somebody else.
JIM WEBB:
He’s a strong choice, no denying it. I don’t think ‘Bama’s gonna choose him but there’s a lot of solid reasons to do so, primary of which is that he is a war hero in an election against a war hero during a time of War. If this were Election ‘04 then ‘Bama’d be nuts to go with anybody else.
But this isn’t in 2004. This is in 2008. A somewhat awakened American Citizenry have almost entirely discovered that the War was both a sham and a huge waste of money and lives. So what does it mean? Obama, having been one of a very few to speak out against it at the time it mattered most, has the Iraq War Debate well in hand.
Joe Biden:
Joe Biden is a cool dude. And he can talk Foreign Policy all day. And he can help you reach across the aisle because he’s got creds with Republican Reds. And everybody knows he’s a good guy, a smart guy and a guy that doesn’t take a whole lot of bullshit. None of which is the reason why Barack Obama will choose him as his VP. Barack Obama will choose Joe Biden for his V.P. because he interviews like a dream and comes across like he knows what he’s talking about.
And this election is all about interviews filtered and twisted through mainstream news outlets and then being deconstructed and wholly analyzed from, for the first time ever, full spectrum perspective. In this brand new FaceBookYouTubeBlogWorlde of ours. Which is a lot of sociotechno-gobbledygook that basically means you want somebody who is comfortable being interviewed by anybody about anything, will competently lay out your positions and perspectives whenever he can.
[faithful readers please note I am but a fledgling Kossack and have yet to master the intricacies of inserting the relevant vid into my blog. Please stand by]
And he’s gonna be like John McCain is my friend and a hero but he’s full of shit on this and it’s obvious and here’s why. You know? All with a smile on his face, like, pffft! McCain, you believe this guy? What is he thinking?
Because there will be bullshit. This is the Biggest of Shows. This is for all the marbles. This is American Politics. Courtesy of your Mainstream Media. And Joe Biden can call bullshit when he sees it and do it with authority. That's my two cents on why he should be Veep.
My two cents. What're you thinkin'? Do you get accolades around here for accurately predicting things like nominees, Presidents, Vice-Presidents and whatnot? A No-Prize? How do these things work?
Poll: Obama's V.P. will be...?
Hillary Clinton
1% 5 votes
NOT Hillary Clinton
33% 127 votes
John Edwards
5% 19 votes
Bill Richardson
4% 18 votes
Jim Webb
18% 68 votes
Joe Biden
12% 46 votes
Other (who?)
24% 91 votes
| 374 votes total
Alternatively: Obama Would be Smarter to Eat His Own Face than Pick Hillary Clinton for V.P.
As opposed to whatever you'd say Cheney's doing, in your far more traditional ‘top-down' styled administrations your VP really has one function and one function alone: Get your Presidential nominee elected. The flipside of which being some kind of cause-no-harm/don't-fuck-up kinda thing, which changes little once actually elected. That having been said and with out further ado I hereby present your 2008 Vice Presidential Short-List
Cutting edge (and still totally FREE!!!) political analysis and predictions below the fold.
THIS JUST IN!!!: alot of talk about Wes Clark (which I find unfathomable), Gore (unlikely he'd go for it), Sibelius is coming up alot, there's some good points on Kaine and there's an awful lot of Edwards talk...
*
NOT HILLARY CLINTON:
If Obama makes Hillary his veep I will gleefully admit I know absolutely nothing about politics and from that very moment will give up blogging forever. Take up gardening or something. Seriously. Because picking Hillary would be the biggest mistake of Bama’s political career whether he won the presidency or not. Especially if he won it! Jesus H!! He wouldn't wish it on his worst enemy, which, at this phase, may well be...Hillary Clinton?
She’s working the same Whitehouse as you? One heartbeat away, as they say? And she’s supposed to do what you tell her to? Facilitate your goals and strategies? Make your vision happen for you, even in the extremely likely event that the two of you disagree? Really?!? Are you kidding me? ‘Bama’s not insane and that’s what you’d have to be to handpick as your VP anybody, any creature of such raw, naked ambition and utter disregard for the basic Rules of Operation.
Hillary as Bama's VP is a preposterous, unthinkable idea and Obama knows it better than anybody on earth with the possible exception of Bill Clinton, who of course recommended it anyways. It will never, ever happen. We must move on and I’m exceptionally happy to.
JOHN EDWARDS:
I’m an Edwards fan but here’s why you don’t pick him as your VP: because he’s already had a shot at it and been a part of a losing election. It didn’t work out for the last guy and you don’t want to associate yourself with the utter misery that was the 2004 Presidential Elections, even peripherally. It’s not fair to him but it is that way. He’d far better serve you as one of the finest Attorneys General that America has ever seen.
BILL RICHARDSON:
Jesus, I hate to say it but here we go anyways: The Black guy picks a Latin guy when Race is already an issue in the nomination, when Billy Hayseed of the Deep South already has reservations enough?
Nope. Never happen. "There’s right and there’s wrong and there’s politics," one asshole said to another. Not fair to Richardson neither but there it is. Oter than that Rcihardson's principle characteristic is that he's a nice guy which Obama seems to already have sewn up quite...nicely. Ahem. And sure, there's some Foreign Policy advantages to choosing Richardson but if that's the qualifier in your VP selection do you choose Richradson or somebody else? You choose somebody else.
JIM WEBB:
He’s a strong choice, no denying it. I don’t think ‘Bama’s gonna choose him but there’s a lot of solid reasons to do so, primary of which is that he is a war hero in an election against a war hero during a time of War. If this were Election ‘04 then ‘Bama’d be nuts to go with anybody else.
But this isn’t in 2004. This is in 2008. A somewhat awakened American Citizenry have almost entirely discovered that the War was both a sham and a huge waste of money and lives. So what does it mean? Obama, having been one of a very few to speak out against it at the time it mattered most, has the Iraq War Debate well in hand.
Joe Biden:
Joe Biden is a cool dude. And he can talk Foreign Policy all day. And he can help you reach across the aisle because he’s got creds with Republican Reds. And everybody knows he’s a good guy, a smart guy and a guy that doesn’t take a whole lot of bullshit. None of which is the reason why Barack Obama will choose him as his VP. Barack Obama will choose Joe Biden for his V.P. because he interviews like a dream and comes across like he knows what he’s talking about.
And this election is all about interviews filtered and twisted through mainstream news outlets and then being deconstructed and wholly analyzed from, for the first time ever, full spectrum perspective. In this brand new FaceBookYouTubeBlogWorlde of ours. Which is a lot of sociotechno-gobbledygook that basically means you want somebody who is comfortable being interviewed by anybody about anything, will competently lay out your positions and perspectives whenever he can.
[faithful readers please note I am but a fledgling Kossack and have yet to master the intricacies of inserting the relevant vid into my blog. Please stand by]
And he’s gonna be like John McCain is my friend and a hero but he’s full of shit on this and it’s obvious and here’s why. You know? All with a smile on his face, like, pffft! McCain, you believe this guy? What is he thinking?
Because there will be bullshit. This is the Biggest of Shows. This is for all the marbles. This is American Politics. Courtesy of your Mainstream Media. And Joe Biden can call bullshit when he sees it and do it with authority. That's my two cents on why he should be Veep.
My two cents. What're you thinkin'? Do you get accolades around here for accurately predicting things like nominees, Presidents, Vice-Presidents and whatnot? A No-Prize? How do these things work?
Poll: Obama's V.P. will be...?
Hillary Clinton
1% 5 votes
NOT Hillary Clinton
33% 127 votes
John Edwards
5% 19 votes
Bill Richardson
4% 18 votes
Jim Webb
18% 68 votes
Joe Biden
12% 46 votes
Other (who?)
24% 91 votes
| 374 votes total
"Autocannibalism" or "How to Lose ANOTHER No-Brainer Election to a Neocon"
Mon Mar 31, 2008 at 05:17:11 PM PST
I can believe you guys run elections like this. It’s amazing. I’m utterly agog. What the Christ is all this? How much does all it cost? Are you NUTS?!? They’re eating each other alive out there! McCain’s crew is just laying back, dropping long-range YouTube bombs and laughing their arses off! Hill’s junk is strewed all over the tarmac in Bosnia and the media’ll pump it up like it’s freaking WhiteWater even as it replays the latest and greatest from Obama’s Reverend buddy who just happens to be an angry Black man. Jesus wept! So freaking what?!? After Katrina, I’m an angry Black man and I’m not even Black!!!!
Divide and conquer is back. Except this is subdivide and conquer further. SuperPlusDivision. Politics of Fear melds with race. Throw some religion and politics in there and maybe you can never get together again! The Republicans are, to a man, laughing their asses off right now, I assure you, rightfully freaking so. The Democrats, somehow, are screwing even this one up. You know, fool that I am, I always assumed the first Post Bush election was supposed to be a no-brainer but NOT LIKE THIS! Jesus H. Suffering Christ, GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER. It’s like a little mini version of your Electoral College where once again we find important decisions decided by something other than the popular vote. In this case you’ll find your Democracy subverted by yet another collection of old and mostly white and mostly male and entirely rich SuperDelegates whom, collectively, apparently know better than the voters what is best for...the voters. Am I alone in thinking; just what the blistering fuque is going on here? What’s wrong with most little pieces of paper with the candidate’s name on it wins? Why the extra step? Is there a Doctor Ockham in the house?
Is the Universe that fucked up that I now have to imagine a world in which (urrppp) McCain will be the next American president? After Dubya? The ‘bomb-bomb-Iran’ guy is on deck? The ‘strolling through the streets of Baghdad’ guy gets a shake at it? Must I consider it possible? Yes Virginia, and here’s why; Bush, dufus and moron that he most assuredly be and however it actually went down, managed to seize the office not once but twice. So yeah. It’s possible. And there it be. An idea so hideous that it tastes like rank puke inside my mind as I think it, but there it be. The "100 years is fine with me" guy is actually a threat. And he is. Don’t kid yourself. The value of having a gushing and horny media on your side is not to be debated, at all, in any way. And they fall all over this guy. This is already well-established and admitted by a lot of big-name Media vampires already, vampires like Joey the Scar and that hideous twit Matthews. Are you catching this? They’ve already chosen their sides. Media controls the message, media loves McCain...
Look, maybe this ‘Bama cat’s the real deal. Maybe it always takes just that one person, that archetypal, zeitgeistal hero to step up and name aloud the beasts that lurk in the bushes and slay them where they lay, for once and for all. That one person that starts a movement or maybe just accelerates one, gurgles it to the surface and maybe somehow that one person is able to turn the whole awful mess into something new. Maybe it’s a Renaissance. Maybe it’s his destiny. Maybe it isn’t. I don’t know. I am equal parts Hope and Cynicism at this point, not of him, not at all. But of them. And you. All of you. Some of you.
You.
What will you do, come November? Because you’re one of the players on the stage of a show that the whole world is watching. It’s like football with global implications. It’s the All American Soap Opera, complete with heroes and bad guys and sex and race and violence and hope and...well, you got me. It’s one hell of a show. I hope it turns out alright in the end is all I can say at this point. I’m a little concerned, myself. Have been for some time, to be honest. And I know some of you have too, but the question (and it’s key) is how many of you are concerned? Sure, there’s those amongst you that are entirely switched on and active and know the score but I wonder about that other number, not of those that are lost forever, the "Dubya For Life, Stupid and Proud of It" but the other, possibly far greater number. How many are just switched off and couldn’t be bothered? Can’t get the time off work, gotta watch their favorite shows, get drunk on the weekends and that’s about it. Work, tv, drink, fuck and die. The "Leave Politics for the Assholes" people. How many of those? That’s the real number. In any country. How many just couldn’t give a fuck? It really is the nut of the thing.
Like if this thing drags on to the point that you hate everybody involved and can’t be bothered with any of it? That’s the real cost of this primary season running so long and ugly as it has. Hills should fuckin’ bow out and just about everybody knows it except for the hack punditocracy that want this thing to go on for as long as possible for two, very simple and basic reasons:
1. If it bleeds it leads and Hills and B-Rack are bleedin’ all over the screen, 24-7.
2. It benefits Johnny ‘Bomb Bomb’ McCain, whom they love and will do whatever they can to elect in November. Rich keep getting’ richer and the people that matter live happily ever after. Right? Right. Listen, for the good of America and the entire planet, get this thing together, would you? Because the other side is lining itself up and they're ready to go. One more neocon gets one more gnarled hands on the dice. That's what's at stake here Photobucket and every second there is an undecided Democratic nominee facilitates the previously unthinkable.
Friends, bloggers, Kossacks, let us speak frankly. Never before has the fate of the entire world ever weighed so heavily upon the citizenry of one single nation. This one's for all the marbles. And it's all you, baby.
Peace.
And good luck.
-iSC
Poll: John McCain is...
Not a threat. A hundred years in Iraq? Admittedly knows dick about economics? Older than the Bible? Puh-leeze.
14% 7 votes
A threat so long as Hillary keeps SCREWING THIS THING UP
32% 16 votes
A strong threat because the Media loves him and will do everything in its power to hand him the presidency, for what should now be obvious reasons
54% 27 votes
| 50 votes total
I can believe you guys run elections like this. It’s amazing. I’m utterly agog. What the Christ is all this? How much does all it cost? Are you NUTS?!? They’re eating each other alive out there! McCain’s crew is just laying back, dropping long-range YouTube bombs and laughing their arses off! Hill’s junk is strewed all over the tarmac in Bosnia and the media’ll pump it up like it’s freaking WhiteWater even as it replays the latest and greatest from Obama’s Reverend buddy who just happens to be an angry Black man. Jesus wept! So freaking what?!? After Katrina, I’m an angry Black man and I’m not even Black!!!!
Divide and conquer is back. Except this is subdivide and conquer further. SuperPlusDivision. Politics of Fear melds with race. Throw some religion and politics in there and maybe you can never get together again! The Republicans are, to a man, laughing their asses off right now, I assure you, rightfully freaking so. The Democrats, somehow, are screwing even this one up. You know, fool that I am, I always assumed the first Post Bush election was supposed to be a no-brainer but NOT LIKE THIS! Jesus H. Suffering Christ, GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER. It’s like a little mini version of your Electoral College where once again we find important decisions decided by something other than the popular vote. In this case you’ll find your Democracy subverted by yet another collection of old and mostly white and mostly male and entirely rich SuperDelegates whom, collectively, apparently know better than the voters what is best for...the voters. Am I alone in thinking; just what the blistering fuque is going on here? What’s wrong with most little pieces of paper with the candidate’s name on it wins? Why the extra step? Is there a Doctor Ockham in the house?
Is the Universe that fucked up that I now have to imagine a world in which (urrppp) McCain will be the next American president? After Dubya? The ‘bomb-bomb-Iran’ guy is on deck? The ‘strolling through the streets of Baghdad’ guy gets a shake at it? Must I consider it possible? Yes Virginia, and here’s why; Bush, dufus and moron that he most assuredly be and however it actually went down, managed to seize the office not once but twice. So yeah. It’s possible. And there it be. An idea so hideous that it tastes like rank puke inside my mind as I think it, but there it be. The "100 years is fine with me" guy is actually a threat. And he is. Don’t kid yourself. The value of having a gushing and horny media on your side is not to be debated, at all, in any way. And they fall all over this guy. This is already well-established and admitted by a lot of big-name Media vampires already, vampires like Joey the Scar and that hideous twit Matthews. Are you catching this? They’ve already chosen their sides. Media controls the message, media loves McCain...
Look, maybe this ‘Bama cat’s the real deal. Maybe it always takes just that one person, that archetypal, zeitgeistal hero to step up and name aloud the beasts that lurk in the bushes and slay them where they lay, for once and for all. That one person that starts a movement or maybe just accelerates one, gurgles it to the surface and maybe somehow that one person is able to turn the whole awful mess into something new. Maybe it’s a Renaissance. Maybe it’s his destiny. Maybe it isn’t. I don’t know. I am equal parts Hope and Cynicism at this point, not of him, not at all. But of them. And you. All of you. Some of you.
You.
What will you do, come November? Because you’re one of the players on the stage of a show that the whole world is watching. It’s like football with global implications. It’s the All American Soap Opera, complete with heroes and bad guys and sex and race and violence and hope and...well, you got me. It’s one hell of a show. I hope it turns out alright in the end is all I can say at this point. I’m a little concerned, myself. Have been for some time, to be honest. And I know some of you have too, but the question (and it’s key) is how many of you are concerned? Sure, there’s those amongst you that are entirely switched on and active and know the score but I wonder about that other number, not of those that are lost forever, the "Dubya For Life, Stupid and Proud of It" but the other, possibly far greater number. How many are just switched off and couldn’t be bothered? Can’t get the time off work, gotta watch their favorite shows, get drunk on the weekends and that’s about it. Work, tv, drink, fuck and die. The "Leave Politics for the Assholes" people. How many of those? That’s the real number. In any country. How many just couldn’t give a fuck? It really is the nut of the thing.
Like if this thing drags on to the point that you hate everybody involved and can’t be bothered with any of it? That’s the real cost of this primary season running so long and ugly as it has. Hills should fuckin’ bow out and just about everybody knows it except for the hack punditocracy that want this thing to go on for as long as possible for two, very simple and basic reasons:
1. If it bleeds it leads and Hills and B-Rack are bleedin’ all over the screen, 24-7.
2. It benefits Johnny ‘Bomb Bomb’ McCain, whom they love and will do whatever they can to elect in November. Rich keep getting’ richer and the people that matter live happily ever after. Right? Right. Listen, for the good of America and the entire planet, get this thing together, would you? Because the other side is lining itself up and they're ready to go. One more neocon gets one more gnarled hands on the dice. That's what's at stake here Photobucket and every second there is an undecided Democratic nominee facilitates the previously unthinkable.
Friends, bloggers, Kossacks, let us speak frankly. Never before has the fate of the entire world ever weighed so heavily upon the citizenry of one single nation. This one's for all the marbles. And it's all you, baby.
Peace.
And good luck.
-iSC
Poll: John McCain is...
Not a threat. A hundred years in Iraq? Admittedly knows dick about economics? Older than the Bible? Puh-leeze.
14% 7 votes
A threat so long as Hillary keeps SCREWING THIS THING UP
32% 16 votes
A strong threat because the Media loves him and will do everything in its power to hand him the presidency, for what should now be obvious reasons
54% 27 votes
| 50 votes total
Barack's Staffers are Not Idiots and I'm a Dick
Tue Feb 26, 2008 at 09:02:00 PM PST
Your opponent shows up in a coffin, nailed up tight but for one or two empty slots, for which you have both nails and hammer in hand. What do you do, what do...you do? If you're Barrack Obama in the 20th Democratic Nomination Debate, nothing apparently, or at least not enough. For which I don't blame him specifically, I quite like the fellow and think him vastly superior to his hawkish opponent. But his staffers should be boiled and eaten for not making him tee up on the obvious, easy ones. Don't you think? Is it just me? I mean, I understand the 'taking the high road' but man, give somethin' to the fans, would ya?
UPDATE: Changed the title of this little blog 'o mine due to massive and quite justifiable protests against the very idea that these same staffers that have obviously worked very hard and played no small role in taking 'Bama to where he is today, poised to capture the Democratic nomination, could possibly be idiots. I withdraw the assertion without reservation and in my own defense all I can say is...well...don't blog angry, people! I was told it's too late to change said title yet did it anyways. Apologies to all involved, where applicable, have a nice day
*
Hills talks about her Iraq vote and the preemptive war and says, and I quote
"President Bush waged a preemptive war and I warned against it."
You catch that? She warned against it? When?
"Tonight, the President gave javascript:void(0)Saddam Hussein one last chance to avoid war, and the world hopes that Saddam Hussein will finally hear this ultimatum, understand the severity of those words, and act accordingly. While we wish there were more international support for the effort to disarm Saddam Hussein, at this critical juncture it is important for all of us to come together in support of our troops"
I see no warning there on the Hill's part. you? A warning would be like saying "look, don't do this. We shouldn't invade preemptively. It's sets back the internationalist movement about a thousand years and makes us look like power-mad hegemonist jerks. Just...stop it."
Hill's saying she made some kind of adequate warning against a premeptive strike doesn't jive in any way, shape or form and in a debate you hammer an opponent for stuff like this. Obama let that line, that ludicrous line about Hill's warning float by. It's bloody distressing to me. What else? Oh yeah, here's a goodie:
"Lots of people were speaking out against the war."
Really? Lots? Like...um...politicians? You mean, prior to the invasion itself? That's horseshit. Complete and utter horseshit. It totally denies the environment of the times in which ANY anti-war talk was denounced wholesale by both major political parties and shouted down widely through the supposedly free US of A. I remember Gore speaking out about it and getting utterly slagged by the entirety of the mainstream media, from far Right to Centrist (sadly, not for the first time nor last) and nobody really coming to his defense. We know hubby Bill said bupkis about it until 2008(at which point he claims he was against it, though since he never spoke out about the impending, massive, American-made disaster we'll just have to take his word for it) and Hawk was as big as cheerleader for it as anybody on the Left. As anybody you care to name, bar none. Lots of people were speaking out against it? It's revisionist history and it's actually insulting to those of us that marched and protested and wrote and blogged and debated against the whole godawful thing. She shoulda been slagged for it, it was an easy point to make and Barrack chose not to, much to my consternation and my dog's good natured concern.
The perfect example though? Free Trade, how shite it's been for America and how Hill should take responsibility for it if she's taking responsility for everything else Bill did. They talked Free Trade but Obama held off the easy point until Russert basically dragged it out of him with a clip he'd made. Had the question not been asked, the point would never be made that Clinton, if sharing responsibility for all the accomplishments of her hubbies presidency ought also take responsility for the hideously tragic NAFTA plan.
My point is, don't hold off on those easy points if you want to put the nail in the coffin. That's it, that's all, and maybe Barack's too nice a guy to do it but if disaster strikes and barrack Obama manages to lose this thing I guarantee you, it's because he didn't knock the nobrainers out of the park.
All for now.
-iSenseChange
Your opponent shows up in a coffin, nailed up tight but for one or two empty slots, for which you have both nails and hammer in hand. What do you do, what do...you do? If you're Barrack Obama in the 20th Democratic Nomination Debate, nothing apparently, or at least not enough. For which I don't blame him specifically, I quite like the fellow and think him vastly superior to his hawkish opponent. But his staffers should be boiled and eaten for not making him tee up on the obvious, easy ones. Don't you think? Is it just me? I mean, I understand the 'taking the high road' but man, give somethin' to the fans, would ya?
UPDATE: Changed the title of this little blog 'o mine due to massive and quite justifiable protests against the very idea that these same staffers that have obviously worked very hard and played no small role in taking 'Bama to where he is today, poised to capture the Democratic nomination, could possibly be idiots. I withdraw the assertion without reservation and in my own defense all I can say is...well...don't blog angry, people! I was told it's too late to change said title yet did it anyways. Apologies to all involved, where applicable, have a nice day
*
Hills talks about her Iraq vote and the preemptive war and says, and I quote
"President Bush waged a preemptive war and I warned against it."
You catch that? She warned against it? When?
"Tonight, the President gave javascript:void(0)Saddam Hussein one last chance to avoid war, and the world hopes that Saddam Hussein will finally hear this ultimatum, understand the severity of those words, and act accordingly. While we wish there were more international support for the effort to disarm Saddam Hussein, at this critical juncture it is important for all of us to come together in support of our troops"
I see no warning there on the Hill's part. you? A warning would be like saying "look, don't do this. We shouldn't invade preemptively. It's sets back the internationalist movement about a thousand years and makes us look like power-mad hegemonist jerks. Just...stop it."
Hill's saying she made some kind of adequate warning against a premeptive strike doesn't jive in any way, shape or form and in a debate you hammer an opponent for stuff like this. Obama let that line, that ludicrous line about Hill's warning float by. It's bloody distressing to me. What else? Oh yeah, here's a goodie:
"Lots of people were speaking out against the war."
Really? Lots? Like...um...politicians? You mean, prior to the invasion itself? That's horseshit. Complete and utter horseshit. It totally denies the environment of the times in which ANY anti-war talk was denounced wholesale by both major political parties and shouted down widely through the supposedly free US of A. I remember Gore speaking out about it and getting utterly slagged by the entirety of the mainstream media, from far Right to Centrist (sadly, not for the first time nor last) and nobody really coming to his defense. We know hubby Bill said bupkis about it until 2008(at which point he claims he was against it, though since he never spoke out about the impending, massive, American-made disaster we'll just have to take his word for it) and Hawk was as big as cheerleader for it as anybody on the Left. As anybody you care to name, bar none. Lots of people were speaking out against it? It's revisionist history and it's actually insulting to those of us that marched and protested and wrote and blogged and debated against the whole godawful thing. She shoulda been slagged for it, it was an easy point to make and Barrack chose not to, much to my consternation and my dog's good natured concern.
The perfect example though? Free Trade, how shite it's been for America and how Hill should take responsibility for it if she's taking responsility for everything else Bill did. They talked Free Trade but Obama held off the easy point until Russert basically dragged it out of him with a clip he'd made. Had the question not been asked, the point would never be made that Clinton, if sharing responsibility for all the accomplishments of her hubbies presidency ought also take responsility for the hideously tragic NAFTA plan.
My point is, don't hold off on those easy points if you want to put the nail in the coffin. That's it, that's all, and maybe Barack's too nice a guy to do it but if disaster strikes and barrack Obama manages to lose this thing I guarantee you, it's because he didn't knock the nobrainers out of the park.
All for now.
-iSenseChange
Friday, February 08, 2008
American Lemming
Wed Feb 06, 2008 at 08:21:38 PM PST
Three reasons not to pay attention to anything Britney Spears ever says or does:
If this latest round of weirdness means she’s genuinely sick then this necessarily makes the ongoing coverage of what is obviously some kind of mental illness genuinely sicker and you, for following it but probably pretending to others that you’re not folowing it, sicker yet.
See also: depraved, see also: pathetic, see also: ghoulish
If she’s doing it for attention this necessarily makes her smarter than both the press and far more smarter than you, which I would hope you find very troubling. I do. Know why? You are the one that gets to decide who will become the next leader of the free world. The press has an excuse: you. Celebrities don’t matter even one bit unless they not only decide to do something important but actually carry through with it and accomplish it. Until then, stop. Just stop. It doesn’t matter who’s dating whom, not even a bit. Put your little magazines away. Forever. And get a life.
Yes sir, were it up to me? My news tv? Celebrity free. Betcher ass. Can somebody (anybody) explain to me why a smart fella with such a smart show like Olbermann and his ‘Countdown’ has to routinely devote his number one story to infotainment news crap? I betcha it drives him crazy. Prob’ly makes him puke in his mouth every time he mentions her. At least, I hope that’s the case.
Because here’s the thing: America sleeps. Still. So many important things and issues with huge ramifications, so little time and what’s the one thing the fiends in charge of hurtling your country ever forward towards the largest faceplant in history know beyond a shadow of a doubt? That you are the most easily misdirected populace in history. And they’re absolutely right. And a full three quarters of you (this is me being generous) are almost completely asleep to anything beyond entertainment, work and getting drunk.
Hate to say it but even the enlightened amongst you are not paying full attention, which means I'm talking to you, Kossacks.
Anybody reeeeeeeeeeeeeeally genuinely impressed with either of the main Dem candidates platforms on either Health Care or even the Environment? Really? Because these are your people. You are fighting tooth and nail to get these people into office. Is what they’re proposing acceptable to you? Is it enough? Should health care be ‘affordable’ or should it be free? Because I’ll tell you something and I know it to be true: what’s affordable now goes up in cost over time, especially when the Repubbies get their hands on it and in no time at all your right back where you started. Which is going bankrupt because you got sick. Or hurt. Affordable? Are you kidding me?
Lemme ask you this (as the rants keep on coming):Is it enough to create more jobs in the Green sector or do you have to actively take on CO2 emissions, drastically transform public transit and the way each and every citizen in the First World now lives their lives? And not tomorrow, not in 2050 or 2025 but, as the Pope oughta be sayin' but ain't, Right Fucking Now! Why don’t you ask Al Gore what he thinks about 2050 or 2025? He’ll tell you (in vastly grander terms) that you and anybody that talks like that is patently full of shit. And he’d be right.
As for the war? How on earth did Hillary get this far? Has she or has she not been every bit John McCain’s equal in cheerleading this wrongheaded, gawdawful Iraq war until even as late as 2005? 2005! That’s a lot of years to be wrong! How did this happen? How is a hawk still in it for the Dems, how did she ever get a lead in the first place, let alone keep it? What the hell is going on here? You want to put a hawk in? Reeeeeeally? You don’t think hawkishness has been a big part of the problem? Not only for the last eight years but like the last sixty? You don't think another approach is, like, maybe a good idea? You still going to be championing unilateral preemptive striking when China's the big superpower? Somehow I don't think so.
This has been a rant. I realize that now and I apologize. I realize that it started with Britney and ended with Hillary and I also realize that makes me look like some kind of misogynist. I know some of you’ll be pissed that I have trashed and continue to trash Hillary for her consistently wrong stance on both the ongoing Iraq War and the still potentially impending clusterfuck in Iran but what can I do? I’m anti-war and she's very clearly not and I challenge anybody to deonnstrate otherwise or you can just quit yer bellyachin'. Can't do it? Knew you couldn't. I think it's a mistake to vote for her or even consider voting for her. To hell with it. I love women. I think they’re our real hope. Because man has had all the opportunity in the world to get this thing right and we have routinely screwed the pooch in every way possible, time and time again. I said it before; the second Oprah Winfrey decides to run for president I will gladly sing her praises from the highest mountaintops.
In the meantime, it’s incumbent upon Americans to wake up, pay attention to what’s important and hold your candidate’s feet to the fire, be that candidate the white chick or the black dude. You want free health care and you want not only change but massive change to fight Global Climate Abuse and you want it not now, not fifty years from now but Right Fucking Now and not only that, you want the corporate stranglehold of the citizenry to be banished once and for all. That last one sound impossible? Repeal one law and it’s done. Didja know that? One law. Look it up.
All for now. I can only hope I didn't make anybody puke in their mouth.
Saturday, January 05, 2008
Zeitgeistal Uplink
Sat Dec 22, 2007 at 05:26:08 PM PST
America most needs a Kucinich, would be lucky to get an Edwards, will most likely get an Obama and hopefully not a Clinton.
Forget Polls and Electability: Which Candidate Would be the Best President?
a) Dennis Kucinich because he's got the best voting record by far and is the closest answer to what America really needs.
29% 15 votes
b) Bill Richardson, because he's, well...I confess, I know very little about this man. Seems like a nice guy.
0% 0 votes
c) Chris Dodd, who just showed his whole party how to stand up and fight and face down the Far Right nutters.
15% 8 votes
d) Joe Biden, who actually knows a little about the world outside the Great American Bubble. And he's actually a pretty solid dude with excellent leadership experience
1% 1 votes
e) John Edwards who is dead-on, ball's accurate on Poverty, Health Care and Corporate Greed.
23% 12 votes
f) Barrack Obama because he can heal the Great American Divide and is, any way you slice it, an agent of Change
11% 6 votes
g) Hillary Clinton because she has experience, her husband is Bill and she's one smart cookie any way you slice it. And smart is vastly preferable to what was elected last time.
13% 7 votes
h) Mike Gravel because he's MAD AS HELL AND NOT GONNA TAKE IT ANYMORE!
3% 2 votes
Tony Snow and the War on Santa God
Tue Dec 18, 2007 at 09:38:07 AM PST
REPORTER: "Do we know whose behind this new "War on God," I mean, do we just naturally assume it's Satan? Is Hell involved or is it just Americans?"
SNOW: "Is Hell overtly involved? Tough to say. My good buddy Bill O'Really asserts that DailyKos readers worship Satan. Is that the case? I'm sure in some instances, yes, absolutely, just as Hell and the Devil can probably be found in things like the ACLU or impeachment investigations or Congress or people that read books by Noam Chomsky. Next question?"
REPORTER: "Given that America's War on Drugs, Terror and specifically Afghanistan and Iraq have each been such epic failures, what makes us think we're ready to take on God? Or even Hell? Or...whomever. Who are we fighting again?"
SNOW: "Secular fascists."
REPORTER: "So, technically, each other?"
SNOW: "Exactly."
SNOW: "But let me hone that in a little for you. We're at war with the evil secularists amongst us, just like we were at war with the terrorist sympathizers as recently as just yesterday and just like we were at war with communist sympathizers a few decades ago. It's not uncommon for America to be at war against it's own citizens. It's actually a proud part of our national heritage!"
REPORTER: "But given the already serious divsions that exist within America today, probably the most divided American citizenry in history, do we need something else to divide ourselves over? I mean, a good chunk of us don't believe there even is a God, so how can we be at war with him? Or...Him."
SNOW: "We're not at war with 'Him'. We're at war with 'them.'"
REPORTER: "Whom?"
SNOW: "The evil secularists."
REPORTER: "Then why isn't it the 'War on Secularism' or 'Secular Fascism?' Is it because the war is more marketable if it's against capital-G God as opposed to a system of government in which the ruling class keep their religion to themselves? And are we at war with Atheists as well?"
SNOW: "Not at all. Just the Secular Atheists."
REPORTER: "Jesus."
SNOW: "Exactly. Next question?"
REPORTER: "What do you make of DKos blogger and eminent sage iSenseChange's assertion that this whole "War on God" nonsense (his words, not mine, amen hallelujah) is just the Republican Party's pathetic attempt at hedging it's bets going into the 08 elections, that the creation of a patently ridiculous "War on God" is laughable on its face and a very simple attempt at dividing the electorate while not dealing with a single issue of importance, like say, health care reform, the Iraq War or the impending recession? After seven years of George 'Dubya' Bush fucking up everything he's ever laid eyes on, is religion basically all you guys have left at this point? Are you that desperate?"
SNOW: "This iSenseChange is both a DailyKos blogger and an Atheist? Sounds like we've found our new Osama. He's a blogger. Is he an American? We have no way of knowing. He might even be a Muslim."
REPORTER: "Well, actually he's an avowed Atheist. so..."
SNOW: "So he might even be an Islamo-Atheo-Fascist-Extremist. That's the worst kind."
REPORTER: "Sounds scary as hell! Let's hope we find this guy!"
SNOW: "We'll smoke him out. Next question? Mr. Gannon?"
GANNON: "Given the nature of America's brand new war, which of the presidential contenders would be best suited to lead America in these, the darkest of times? Do any of them have a theology degree? Any decent speeches about this war recently?"
READER'S POLL
What war would be preferable to one on God?
a) the War on Homelessness
9% 4 votes
b) the War on Corporate Greed
15% 7 votes
c) the War on Presidential Criminality
18% 8 votes
d) the War on Environmental Destruction
6% 3 votes
e)the War on the Dumbing Down of the American Citizenry
50% 22 votes
Tuesday, December 04, 2007
Mormon Mitt's Defining Moment
Mon Dec 03, 2007 at 09:15:45 PM PST
Romney will get the plasticky android vote but the nomination? Only if he can give one hell of a speech on what the talking heads have taken to calling his "Mormon Problem," which is funny enough all on its own.
Mitt's initially attempted to make his "Mormon Problem" a non-issue with the master stroke of claiming he'd like to talk about it but he's not allowed:
"Is there going to be a special speech? Perhaps, at some point. I sort of like the idea myself. The political advisers tell me no, no, no — it's not a good idea. It draws too much attention to that issue alone."
It was a positively brilliant distraction: we all end up thinking that he's just an idiot that can't think for himself and is too stupid to cover this potentially damaging fact up rather than a Mormon that is...well...a Mormon. Look, stupiding your way to the president worked just fine for George 'Dubya' Bush not once but twice and Rolling Stone's Matt Taibbi is on the record as suspecting the same strategy hard at work for Fred Thompson. Well, sort of hard at work. At work. Point is, post Dubya, stupid is the new smart in American politics, so why shouldn’t Mitt jump onboard as well?
All for naught, it seems his advisors now tell him he is indeed allowed to talk openly about his Mormon problem, for which we all await with baited breath and which the media has already dubbed Romney’s ‘JFK speech’ (offend anybody? No? Moving on...). This in reference to Kennedy’s very successful pitch to the masses in 1960, the major difference being that Mitt wouldn’t dream of saying he’d keep his Faith seperate from his job but rather that his Faith is just as pro God, pro Bible, pro Jesus, pro-Torturing-and-Nuking as yours is and a mighty Amen to all that.
Can he pull it off? Dunno. Tough row to hoe. Many feel he'd have better luck being elected as an Atheist than a Mormon. A Mormon? Multiple wives? This is America. Might as well start marrying the livestock. Blacks not having souls until the late sixties? Might not be a big deal with the Far Right who evidently still doubt they have souls in 2007 but these are the kind of things that can come back and haunt a would-be presidential contender that needs to win more than just the Big Business and Bible Belt vote. Secret, fireproof underwear? Sounds like James Bond stuff to me and I'm all for it. Seems like a good idea for just about anybody, let alone a presidential candidate, so maybe it's a good place for him to start.
His all knowing handlers have claimed Mitt’s speech is "not going to be a lesson in Mormon doctrine" but rather "an open discussion of how important and critical faith has been and is in Romney’s life" and "how faith is what shapes our values.."
And if that’s the case, Mitt’s sunk and his advisors are punks. People don’t really want a good sermon but if they did, Huckabee’s got that market cornered like no candidate in history. (Did you know he’s the only running candidate with a theology degree???? Bet yer ass! Talk about qualified!) Yessiree, Mike Huckabee, who asserts that he doesn’t even think we’re primates, which is funny and weird all at the same time, has the religio-chops to sermonize rings around any and all comers, Romney obviously included, which would be great if he were running for Pope, scary and extremely backwards since Huck’s running for President of the United States. Nonetheless here we all are.
Nope, Mitt’s gotta make the case for not just a religious president but a Mormon one or he’s dead in the water and to do so he’s gotta shed light on the ‘Otherness’ that clings to him like a wet fart and has from the start. That means (at the very least) confronting the multi-wife thing (only weird Mormons, a minority of what we like to call the ‘Other Mormons’ do that sort of thing and I am certainly not one of those), the no souls for black folks until the late sixties thing (yeah, well, somebody had a revelation, okay? Old Testament meets New Testament, okay? You either believe in revelations or you don’t, okay? Okay?!?) and the fireproof secret undie thing (Steve Young wore secret Mormon fireproof underpants while quarterbacking the Niners through how many championship seasons? How many Superbowl rings did your underwear ever get you? None? Boom! Done! Mormon’s fuckin' RULE!!!).
He takes these issues head-on and in the manner I’ve laid out then he has a chance against the possibly sleeping actor, the creationist preacher, the confused war vet and the transvestite. Anything less and he’s officially an also-ran.
Frontrunner Nothing: Why Hills and Gules Won't Win
Tue Nov 27, 2007 at 12:12:29 PM PST
Media coverage to the contrary I never bought for even ten seconds that Hillary Clinton is going to be the next President. She's not even the next Democratic contender. Too far Right of the Zeitgeist is my sense of it. People want out of Iraq and they don't want to go to Iran and Hills bolloxed it up badly when she voted to name the Iranian Whoozitswhatzits as a terrorist organization, knowingly opening the door for Retarded George to have one more vicious, failing stab at a Middle East Apocalypse during his mad reign. It's her biggest mistake yet. She can't blow it off, she just voted for it. Edwards called it 'a neocon dream' and scored huge points for that one sentence and rightfully so.
Media coverage to the contrary I never bought for even ten seconds that Hillary Clinton is going to be the next President. She's not even the next Democratic contender. Too far Right of the Zeitgeist is my sense of it. People want out of Iraq and they don't want to go to Iran and Hills bolloxed it up badly when she voted to name the Iranian Whoozitswhatzits as a terrorist organization, knowingly opening the door for Retarded George to have one more vicious, failing stab at a Middle East Apocalypse during his mad reign. It's her biggest mistake yet. She can't blow it off, she just voted for it. Edwards called it 'a neocon dream' and scored huge points for that one sentence and rightfully so.
Hills is the Republican-lite candidate, has her eyes on gaining the middle ground in the general election when she hasn’t won the first battle amongst her fellow Democrats. Edwards can go far by continuing to demonstrate how deeply cozy Hills is with the Big Business establishment and the status quo and should beat her like a drum daily for her vote on the Iran deal, all of which will benefit Barrack Obama more than anybody else.
As for the other media generated, Big Business champion/frontrunner, Guiliani toes the Bush-line without reservation and, in a sane world, should be utterly doomed for that and that alone. What it actually means is that Rudy 'Always 911' Guliani enjoys full neoconservative support, materials, funding, department of dirty tricks, timely governmental threat alerts, prob'ly Rove and the gargantuan weight of the Far Right, Fight-to-the-Death Cult. Having said all that, I just don’t believe anybody can win the Republican nomination if he’s been photographed wearing a dress on at least seven different occasions, which Gules most certainly has.
Vegas odds have it an even bet that should this man ever get elected he’ll get caught smooching an expensive portrait of John F. Kennedy while dressed up like Marilyn Monroe and singing "I Feel Pretty" inside of three weeks in the White House.
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