Dubya, World War III and the Damning NIE

Well, there it is. Keep impeachment off the table and the neocons will inevitably try to spin their way into Iran, not having finished their Iraq or Afghanistans. Well, there's nothing really surprising here, it's simple Cause and Effect and you really can't blame them for trying to trigger World War Three. Might as well blame the scorpion for hiding in your shoe. It's in their nature.

Why not build another phony case for invading Iran or indeed anybody else? Dems have rumbled impotently about pulling out some troops, some time or other with little discernable effect on the President, his policies and wildly aberrant behavior. The American people have not yet shaken the Dorito crumbs off their collective chest, poured themselves out of the couch, switched off the inanely chattering omnipresent boob-tube and actually got pissed off in a way anybody would notice, (like, say during Vietnam?). So if you’re a bloodthirsty, chicken-hawk neocon you gotta be saying ‘why not Iran’? I mean, fuck it, right? It’s the ultimate double down and these cats don’t mind betting the house when it certainly is not now nor has ever been their blood and guts on the line. Not to mention all their Rich Friends just keep getting richer throughout the whole debacle which everybody knows and has still done nothing about.

I never believed that if or when Iran gets the bomb like so many of it’s neighbors have already done, they’re gonna use it on the vastly more powerful Israeli-American axis/alliance (again, call it whatever you like, just acknowledge it exists). It would be a very obvious act of suicide. To which, I’m certain, many of the Rabid Right would say, "well, so what? Are they not a nation of Suicide bombers?" Well, no, actually, not a nation of them. A Nation employs it’s suicide bombers the way the West employs it’s ground troops: only the poor need apply. The Rich, on either side of the ideological divide, almost always have "other priorities." So, Akmaniwhatshisnuts ain’t gonna sacrifice his own skin or that of those that put him in power. Which means he’s actually have to be nuts to fire them at Israel, even if he had the power to do so which he doesn’t.

But bomb away! Seriously, can't blame them. Impeach? Yes. Blame? No. It's not their fault and Jefferson would agree. Jefferson and the fellas knew there'd be greedy evil bastards looking to warp America and its people for their own sick purposes. What the whole American experiment rests on is an informed citizenry to hold these people to account. That job not done, that's who you blame, and it's really that simple.

Make your choice:
Bush invoked WWIII and another pre-emptive strike in spite of the NIE because...

a) He most likely doesn't know what an NIE is and should therefore be impeached for stupidity
15% 7 votes

b) He had only been told about the NIE about a week ago and should therefore be impeached for incompetence
2% 1 votes

c) he figured he'd just spin it when it came out anyways and should be impeached for being a lying bastard. Again.
68% 30 votes

d) the NIE is wrong, Bush is right and will be right in all things forever. FOUR MORE YEARS! FOUR MORE YEARS! FOUR MORE YEARS!!!
13% 6 votes

Iran Just Made America Look Like a Buncha Dicks

Say what you like about Iran, at least they gave them soldiers back to their country and families. If it were Iranians captured anywhere even close to american waters is there any doubt they would already have been tortued extensively by now? No doubt whatsoever and I defy anybody to refute it. You can't. You all know that's what goes on now, that America tortures, no matter what GWB and Darth Cheney say out of both sides of their mouths.

Ugly times when Iran has the moral highground over the good ol' US of A but hey, shit, welcome to the PNAC America!

-iSC

More Kidnapped Troops and Other Reasons to Launch the Apocalypse

You voted him in twice. I wouldn’t even trust him with the keys to my car. And now he’s gonna, what would you say…demo Iran? Whew. The Brits start fishing their sailors around Iranian waters providing that invented aggressor that this administration needs to get it’s last piece of the puzzle, that final kick at the can: Iran! Man! They’re gonna play the Iran card. If not now, when? To not would show immense restraint where before there’s always been absolutely none at all. This is genius. Is Rove on this? I feel in my heart its Cheney. It’s just his type of dastardly, utterly wreckless plan to keep the mad, PNAC, Neo-Con Nutter drive alive: Congress gonna subpoena this or investigate that or impeach what?!? Guess what, motherfuckers? We’re at war with Iran! That’s right! We’re goin’ in! What are you gonna do about it?!? Nothin.’ HAH!!! I’ll take my money now. George ‘Dubya’ Bush is fuckin’ ballsy, I’ll give him that. Crazier than a shithouse rat but pretty fuckin’ ballsy. It’d be admirable if you didn’t absolutely know that he’s a huge fuckup, maybe the biggest in history. Either that or he’s Kaiser Sose and at this point in time things are too fucked up for anybody to make any kind of meaningful guess. Still oscillating at this late date. Utterly insane whichever end of the scale you take.

If we look at this from an Axis vs Allies scenario it clarifies. In times of war the actions of your ally are your own, if you’re any kind of a team at all. Subtlety of a flying mallet, fer fock’s sake. Eh?!? And the UK knows it won’t have to do any of the heavy lifting for this one, if ever again. They don’t even have to get involved beyond lighting the fuse of the damned enterpise. Maybe they’ll take charge of the aftermath and it’ll actually all work out in some crazy way. The Brits clean up whatever mess the US makes in the perfect servile relationship and why not? They’ll be the perfect butlers. They already have the accents. A gold star for you, friend, in your brand New American Century! Where the Rich Get Richer and the Poor go to Prison!

Weird times, many things happening at the same time, so much, so fast. What’s it all mean? Was gonna write this one out of character. Might be impossible now, but what an odd thought. Out of character? What possible impulse? It’s been well established by now that Gonzo is the only way to cover these, the weirdest of times. Yes sir, HST had his finger to the pulse when he fathered this vein of political reporting. Because when Lies and Deceit are universal and the Change is coming on fast and hard, your writing has to be as mercurial as the times or you’re already two steps behind, which is one step away from useless! You gotta be outta yer mind to really have your finger on the pulse of what’s comin’ next because what’s comin’ next might well be out of anybody’s mind. The inmates are running the asylum, they have been for a long time and it turns out this isn’t really an efficient way to to run things. No, Gonzo’s the way to write it, that’s the only certainty in the whole thing maybe, so that hasn’t changed. But what has? Is it her? You?

With so much going on some stuff slips by the filters as your paying more attention to some stories, trying to see how this thing is gonna play out. It’s all about Congress versus President right now, so that’s what your watching and waiting for, some hint about how that scene’ll play out and in the midst of all that you don’t have the focus for the ‘Iran/Uk hostage’ deal. So maybe you don’t see it right away, even after the ridiculously obvious pre-kidnap interview with the single-mother soldier just days before she was taken. How many soldiers in the UK and they just happen to interview one of the hostages days before the kidnapping and she’s a plucky single mom trying to give her child a better life? So, it’s like, you see it happening, right in front of you but you don’t even recognize it as it happens, it looks like something else, even though you’ve been calling for something exactly like this for months now (Yeah. And I saw it. I said the US was gonna do explicitly that on Februrary 12 in a little ditty I wrote that I like to call:NeoCon Versus Nazi: Next Stop Iran! None of which makes me necessarily politically adept or anything, lots of people saw precisely this coming, it just means that I’m catching the obvious ones. Which is more than we can say for the mainstream media, right everybody? Right, Sense). Embarrassing that Rosie McDonald or whatever her name is beat you to the punch on that one, Sensey, oh shit, nailing it for what it is. You’re getting soft, dude. First time I’ve ever found her even remotely interesting. And hey, shit, dissent has found the mainstream! It’s about bloody time!

Not that that’ll stop anything at this point. We all know Bush’s been chompin’ at the bit for this. We all know Cheney’s been foaming at the mouth for this. Everybody’s been crafting plans, everybody’s been shaking fingers, everybody’s been prepared for that all-important reason which turns out to be any reason at all to turn the largest arsenal on earth onto oil-rich Iran and give it a good boot-fucking. You hit Afghanistan, you hit Iraq but you leave the piece in the middle? Are you kidding me? What on earth for?

Who knows. Maybe they’ve learnt something from Iraq but you know what? I doubt it. Don’t think this crew is about learning at all. Betcha George Bush still watches four hours a day of old baseball games.

Right! That’s all for now, Citizens. Keep your eyes on the skies. Time has never been better for a little distraction. Or a big one.

-iSenseChange

NonRandomMP3age: "Personal Jesus" by Depeche Mode

Neocon versus Nazi: Next Stop Iran!

Seems like all I ever hear these days is about going to Iran. At what point is it established? Is it when four major carrier groups are placed in the Gulf, or five? When is it official? Do things have to be blowing up? Is that how we’ll all know that it’s officially Going On Over There Now and we should all be prepared to continue our steady diet of raw, pre-packaged Fear for some time, garnering the consent they’ll not need when the transition to open Fascism and Tyranny is complete? Orwell knew what the fuck was going on, he was just off by a few decades. But what the hell! I’m getting drunk! And so should you! Because they’re firing up another one, these fiends and for my part I only hope they can sell it better at home this time. That last deal was atrocious. This one’s easy and everybody knows it.

RECIPE FOR WAR IN IRAN: go to battle scene. Find bodies. Place evidence like weapons and I.D.s and BANGO, cake and pie, just like that Iran is now funding the Enemy in America’s Big Iraq Adventure and guess what friends and neighbors? The Adventure just got a whole lot bigger. And more expensive. But Dubya’s got a plan. “Ahm jus, hittin’ my stride, heh heh,” Georgie chuckles in his Connecticut, faux-Texas drawl, and why not? He gets another hand at the table, doubling down with dollars and blood against the Anarchy and Chaos in the most dangerous and strategically important area in the world. Maybe he’s got stuff figured out now. Maybe Afghanistan, Iraq and Katrina were just the warm-ups he needed to really dig in and fix this whole MidEast thingy out once and for all. Hey, could happen, right? Right? No? Oh. Shit. I see.

“Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice, well, you’re not gonna fool me again!” But, awful mispronunciations aside, if there’s one thing this War and this President has shown the world several times over is that there’s seemingly no limit to the amount of times even a dolt like him can fool the American people, or at least enough of them. Stole the election twice. About to lead his country into another failure of a war, Iran, being the biggest fuck-up yet. It’s going to make Iraq look like the cakewalk it was always said to be but never, ever was.

ALTERNATIVE RECIPE FOR WAR IN IRAN: float all manner of American military and weaponry into an already crowded and enemy-filled Persian Gulf (I gather the Straight of Hormuz is nice this time of year and as good a place for an ambush as any) and start pushing around til somebody pushes back then pound the bejeezus out of them. I see this in the bars all the time and it almost always initiates the response it seeks, for varying degree of Good or Ill.

Iraq war lead-up? Iran War lead-up? Same shit and very nearly the same pile. Exact same loudmouth far Righties making wild claims and going totally unchallenged from this supposedly Left Wing media conspiracy, unchallenged by the simplest and most basic of questions: “but sir, you were wrong with practically everything that had to do with this Iraq fiasco, why on earth should America believe you in Iran? Shouldn’t you be pretty much finished in the information-providing game? Aren’t we dicks to let you keep broadcasting shit into our homes having already clearly demonstrated that it is, in fact, shit and dangerous shit that costs lives, money and international respect?”

According to Ray McGovern these NeoCons were know throughout Washington as the ‘crazies’ and rightfully so. Name a nuttier group in history. I know you’re gonna say it was the Nazis and yes, they had their own particular vision of how the Earth should be dominated by the Nation they served and yes, they did nutty, awful things because nobody was able to stop them, but would you say they were nuttier? Have you read “Project for the Next American Century?” Maybe not the same game but certainly in the ballpark. Haven’t checked it out yet, never heard of it? PNAC? Until you’re aware of who said it, who signed it and what’s happened since you got absolutely nothing to say about Nazi versus Neocon, and, quite frankly, don't know fuck-all about fuck-all as far as the status of your America in the Y2Ks. Anything you gotta say is just gut reaction and a lack of Real Knowledge of the Facts, you are leap years behind performing your duty as a Citizen and keeping an eye on those that would keep an eye, on governing those that would govern. You’re not interested in that duty, you assume other will do it for you, you can just keep your fluffy, Dorito-crumb encrusted existence for what it is and everything’ll somehow get better, maybe through God or through some kind of latent Positivist leanings or you’re still just hungover from that Last Great Rip before the American Dream floats right down the shitter to be replaced by it’s polar opposite, the American Nightmare. A SuperPower turned Desperate and Depraved, and what’re the Citizens doing? Enjoying the finest television programming in history. And working more hours. For less money. A Nation of Slaves for a Cadre of Vampires, and it’s not like you don’t know it. You do know, somewhere in ya, you know. But it’s always been easier to do nothing. For all of us.

Do I have to wait until they’re actually as bad as the Nazis before I can make a comparison? Because that’s not how it works in pro sports! “This guy might be the next Michael Jordan! Wayne Gretzky! Muhammed Ali! Babe Ruth! Jenna Jameson!” We do it in sports and porn but not politics or history? Why? Oh yeah, there’s just some comparisons we’re not supposed to make until it’s already Too Late, until the Damage has Been Done and the bootheel’s on my freaking neck? Well, fuck you, I guess. That doesn’t sound like a decent plan to me. And shit, how do you know I’m under your sway? I’m a blogger! I have no nationality! I am Earthian, you fucking hayseeds, and you have no sway over me! I am of that larger collective that recognizes the brotherhood of Humanity as transcending in importance over nationalist or religious affiliation. It’s time for the NextLevel, folks, because for good or ill it’s looking like we’ve just about used up this one and it either gets better or worse from here but not both and certainly not neither. Change is not only here but upon us. What color’s your Future?

Iraq War? Iran War? Same shit and very nearly the same pile because it’s all part of the same War, friends, these are “the Great Oil Wars.” Didn’t you know? Catch up. It actually started a long time ago…

Peace, Friends and Fellow Earthians.

-iSenseChange

RandomMP3age: "So Alive" by Love and Rockets

Schoolyard Diplomacy and the Apocalyptic Chicken

Never speak to your enemies. Even if they ask you to. Only threaten them. Because that’s what just always, always works.

Dubya holds True to Form: He’s nuts, first of all. Can we establish that? Nuts. I mean, whatever the measuring stick is, he’s nuts. And he still wants to attack Iran!?! After mismanaging ever single thing he’s ever done in office, including two preemptive and illegal wars and a natural disaster. And yes, Billy-Bob, I understand that you cannot manage a Natural Disaster. You can, however, manage your response to one. Fair enough?

Want more? Ground Zero remains a smouldering hole, the Constitution in tatters, SoleSuperPowerStatus in jeopardy, global opinion at lowest in history, went from balanced books to the Largest National Debt in the entirety of Human History. And in spite of all that (and so much more it staggers me) Dubya still thinks maybe he can pull off somethin’ against Iran. Which most experts agree won’t be the cakewalk that Iraq was supposed to be but never was. It will take nothing less than magic for GWB to somehow not fuck that up. Act of God, maybe. Just throwin' that in there.

Attacking Iran? I figure you’re gonna want a particularily good quarterback for that one, and GWB has never actually been a particularly good anything. Wasn’t he a cheerleader at University? Did I hear that? Is that fact?

I digress. But it’s weird, no? A cheerleader? So weird. Best not to think of it. Where were we? Iran! Right!

Everything you need to know about Iran and America can be broken down into a game of ‘Apocalyptic Chicken.’ “Sure!” America says, “you don’t quit fucking with the nukes we’re gonna smack you down. Hard. Like Iraq. We might not be 'winning' anything but how anxious are you for a big mitful of Iraq-Styled Chaos in yer faces? Wanton, random destruction, pretty much everywhere, no plans and no problems just one big stinking mess. Well? You want that kind of shit on you? Cuz fuck it. We’re on a tear.”

And Iran is like, ‘well, shit, there’s a chance they can’t attack us because of this whole emerging world (America, even!) public opinion thing. There’s that. And the whole fear of finally unifying the Arabs, who could all, regardless of creed or culture, legitimately see the American Adventures as a full fledged invasion on all things Oil. And they’re still stretched ridiculously thin with the wars they’ve got, not to mention the thumpin’ heard literally around the world when the Dems took back the House and Senate.

No way Iran’s gonna blink first. There standing up to the biggest dog on the block and the whole Arab world is watching them do it. If anything, an American attack would only make Iran stronger in the eyes of the Muslim world, ala Hamas after the Israel-Lebanon thing.

So that’s Iran-America for you (see also: North Korea). A game of chicken. Schoolyard Diplomacy in the Nuclear Age, the diplomacy of choice for the manchild American President. And former cheerleader(?). But the Times they are a changin', eh Citizens? You bet yer fur they are.

-iSenseChange

p.p. Oh yeah, almost forgot. Impeach Bush. And Cheney. Now.

p.p.p. Out of Iraq and into Selma! Yowza!

Quotable Quotes: Inre 2/3 of the "Axis of Evil" F@#k Up

"All Iranians would vote for Bush if they could. In three weeks, he struck down our worst enemy, against whom we lost a million dead during the eighties. Even better, he went on to make Iraq an Iranian province!"
-Iranian Oil Minister

George 'Dubya' Bush, making America's enemies incalcuably stronger since 2001.

Discuss amongst yourselves.

-iSC

How to Stop the Rising, World-Beating Tide of Islamofascism

Do Nothing, It Never Existed. One of Dubya’s boys made it up from whole cloth. Kinda like all them WMDs Saddam never had. Or like them connections Saddam and Al Quaeda never had. Or Dubya being from Texas. That kind of shit. Never existed, no basis in Reality. Made from whole cloth. Horse pucky. Chicken of the rubber variety.

Note to reader, whosoever you may be: Do not confuse IslamoFascism with Terrorism. By all means be afraid of Terrorism. That’s why it’s called Terrorism. Yes. Be, um, very afraid. Anyways…

911 scare you into doing whatever we say? What if the Muslims TAKE OVER THE WORLD!!! They’re COMING FRIENDS, and they’ve BROUGHT THEIR BOX-CUTTERS!!! Hope you SPEAK ARABIC!!! Trade in your G-strings for a totally amorphous BURKAH!! Look forward to the rest of your life, dressed up like a SACK OF POTATOES!! BITCHES!!! And what-not.

Ridiculous, I know. But I hear this all the time on this site and others like it. And on TV (granted, only really by the idiots at Fox. Or by Dubya). Like if we don't continue pouring in bodies and bullets at the MidEast then the Fundy Muzzies will rise and somehow aspire to the miraculous position of utter dominance over the far more powerful West, to the point that America's Citizenry will be forced to adopt the odious Way of the Dirty Arab, Forever.

It’s ridiculous. Take over the world. Please. Gonna be tough. Gonna need boats. Lots of ‘em. Got lots of boats? What about shitloads of planes and tanks and such? Got shitloads of planes and tanks and such? Shitloads of satellites and intel? What about ABSOLUTELY LIMITLESS FINANCIAL RESOURCES! Got ABSOLUTELY LIMITLESS FINANCIAL RESOURCES? I figger you don’t. I figger if the best way you’ve devised to fight your blood enemy (who’s firing at you with some of the most sophisticated weapons in the history of War) is by strapping dynamite to your Citizen’s freaking chests, I’m gonna hazard a wild guess that you most likely don’t have ABSOLUTELY LIMITLESS FINANCIAL RESOURCES. Which, you’re gonna need. Gonna have to feed a lot of soldiers. Buy shitloads of box-cutters. And what-not. That’s if you plan on INVADING, OCCUPYING and TAKING OVER THE ENTIRE WORLD.

Yeesh. Whole thing sounds so…I don’t know…Vietnamish? You remember Vietnam, right? The forces of Democracy had to meet head on with the raging Communist hoard, once and for all, with the Freedom of the Entire World at stake? Thank the baby Jesus we did and that we stopped ‘em cold, cuz well, what if we hadn’t? How’s yer Russian, comrade? Seriously. It was that close. But we stopped ‘em cold. Sorry? What’s that? We didn’t? What do you mean we never stopped the Communist advance in the jungles of Vietnam? Is this all some crazy Soviet mass thought experiment? Am I in the Matrix? Cool.

Did you know that Robert MacNamara, who served as Secretary of Defense during the Vietnam War years once got into a fist-fight with his Vietnamese counterpart in a bar because they couldn’t agree on what the Vietnam war had actually been about? True story. Long after the conflict had ended. Vietnamese dude got all indignant. He’s like: “We were joining Communist China?!? Are you crazy? WE’VE FOUGHT THEM OFF IN THESE LANDS FOR CENTURIES.” Then they got into a fist-fight over it. Cuz they couldn’t agree with the cause. Cool, huh? Oh sure, scary as fuck, but a cool story.

I digress. Where was I? Ah yes. The evil Islamofascist scourge. It's not even correct gramatically. You need a fully functioning State to be Fascist. That's in the definition folks. It's how it works.

Do you need to wear underwear under a burkah? I went to a bar in a kilt once and I'll tell you, I had a blast that night. What a hoot. Easiest trip to the biffy you ever saw. Step up to the urinal, lift your kilt and you're off to the races. Had a woman put her hand up my kilt that night and I giggled like a schoolgirl. Can you blame me?

I guess the point is that I’m not telling you not to be afraid of terrorists. I’m not telling you not to be afraid of Islamic extremists. I’m not even trying to tell you not to be afraid of Muslims, dark people, your next door neighbour or circus clowns. I am telling you not to be afraid of the Rising Tide of World-Beating IslamoFascists. It was just the scariest thing the NeoCons could imagine to spring on you after the latest scandal or stupid decision.

THIS HAS BEEN A PUBLIC SERVICE BROUGHT TO YOU BY THE SENSECHANGE CENTER FOR POSITIVE CHANGE. HAVE A GREAT DAY.

That is all.

-iSenseChange

NonRandomMP3age: "Everybody Knows," Leonard Cohen.