Showing posts with label cnn. Show all posts
Showing posts with label cnn. Show all posts

Monday, April 16, 2007

the Gonzo Letters: Anderson Cooper, 360 Degrees of Bullsh*t is Still Bullsh*t


Mr. Anderson, (Cooper? Why do you guys always go by two last names? How's Tucker Carleton doin'? You guys ever give a listen to Wilson Phillips?)

I dare you to interview Nader and ask him what he thinks about George W. Bush. Or the Iraq War. Or the impeachment of the Thief In Chief. Or the destruction of Habeus Corpus and the rest of the Constitution. And the Project for the Next American Century. I triple-dog dare you to interview Noam Chomsky on these same items. Are you even allowed to? I have my doubts. I’m sure you understand. 360 degrees of bullshit is still bullshit, Anderson, and now's as good a time as any to pick up on that little gem.

Got balls, kiddo? Or not? Makes no difference to me. One of you guys is gonna crack and start telling the Real Story. Just lose it out there. Become Big Media’s Hamlet, go all post-modern on the set and find out that rather than getting fired the ratings shoot through the freaking roof, man! They try to cancel the dude and a huge audience that’s been starving for the Real Story actually backs his play. Brings dude back like Family Guy. We’re that hungry for Truth, man! We’d actually watch CNN for it! And you too, Andy!

Yes sir, one of you guys is gonna crack and start tellin’ the Real Story and the rest of you’ll be considering yourself lucky to be judging wet t-shirt contests for a quick buck in Ft. Lauderdale outside of fifteen years, way things are shaping up in America today. People are pissed and there’s all sorts of culpable jackals for people to blame but the one thing just about anybody can agree on, Lefty or Righty, is that the Media is full of shit. And you, friend, are the Media, as much as anybody on earth. And most have an inkling that you and guys like you totally shit the bed on Doing Your Job during the Gulf Deux lead-up lies, leading to Iraq, aka the big, deadly, expensive and stinking mess that every single one of your america citizens has to now find a way to deal with.

Not to mention the whole neoconservative thing? How exactly did you guys miss that? Things like PNAC, so you know, are classified as one of those things people like to know about during things like, for example THE 2000 ELECTIONS before these HIDEOUS FREAKS TOOK OFFICE! People like to know that the running VP is a sick and weird man with sick and weird fiend-buddies that share sick, weird dreams of world domination. People like to know about these things, Andy. It’s called the Real Story. And people want to hear it. All of it.

So do it. Save your soul. Start telling the Real Story, Andersen. Be That Guy. Better you than that chowderhead Zahn, I think we can all agree on that, right? Right. So, do it!

I dare you.

Sincerely,
Manny Duke

p.s. Got another one for you. I dare you to interview the protestors, Andy. Go out there on the street and grab a few of them. They’d love to talk to you. I promise. Be the easiest thing you could ever do, and yet it’s barely ever done. You know how many years I read about Cindy Sheehan before I actually heard her voice on your network? Thanks CNN! You’re the “Most Trusted Name in News!”

*

From : 360
Sent : Saturday, February 3, 2007 8:26 PM
To :
Subject : Anderson Cooper 360

| | | Inbox

Thanks for your email. Here’s our problem. We want you to know that we really do read every single email you viewers send us. No, honestly. But reading your email is one thing, and composing individual answers to each one is another. That would be a full-time enterprise. In which case, there’d be no AC 360. In which case, there’d be no emails. You see where we’re headed.

Anyway, the best we can do is to acknowledge that we have indeed received and will read your message, and this little note is to let you know that. It’s automatic, yes; fails to take into account whether you’ve patted us on the back or slapped us across the face; does not differentiate between praise, correction, fury, proposals of marriage, or invitations to get lost. But rest assured we’ll know that part when we read it!

Thanks again for your interest. Go to CNN.com and click "Watch" for instant access to FREE Video!

AC 360 staff & CNN Public Information
“CNN, The Most Trusted Name In News”

the Gonzo Letters: Mr. Wolf Blitzer


Mr. Blitzer,

I'd like to know when you are going to cover the biggest piece of news to yet come out of the Libby case, specifically a personally handwritten missive from VP Cheney directly implicating the President in the scandal. I refuse to believe CNN has not yet heard of this news, as the evidence was admitted in the case by Libby's defenders and you no doubt have all manner of reporters on the case (no excuses, here’s the link: http://www.truthout.org/docs_2006/013107Z.shtml). So when will you cover it and more importantly, why haven't you yet? 20 minutes every hour on the non-story of Biden's 'supposedly racist but not really' comments and not one mention of this huge story emerging in the Libby case.

Mr Blitzer, you are, as much as anyone else on earth, an established and esteemed member of the 4th estate, sir, and it's well past time all you guys started acting like it, doing this extremely important job of yours so the People get the whole story. What you decide to cover shapes the landscape of discussion and debate, and what you decide not to cover gets buried forever. It's an awesome responsibility, Wolfy, and dude, you ain't cuttin' it! So START!

It’s called evolution Wolf, and if you don’t remain relevant then don’t be surprised when the internet and the blogworlde buries you’re like a stinking, dead cat.

Yours,
iSenseChange

p.s. appreciated your mewling interview with Veep Cheney very much. You very nearly showed some sand asking the Dark Lord himself about his lesbian daughter! ‘Out of line’ indeed, imagine you asked him the questions that really matter! Like his profiteering with Halliburton! Hoo boy, the fit hits the shan then, eh Wolfy? Anywho, glad to see an inkling of spine for once. Peace to you Wolfy. And do your fucking job!

*

Thank you for the e-mail you sent to The Situation Room. This auto reply is your notification that we have received it.
While we are unable to personally reply to every e-mail, your comments are important to us, and we do read each and every one. Comments become part of the viewer response report that is prepared and made available each day to our producers and senior management. If you have mistakenly submitted a question or story idea through this comments section, please allow time for it to be tagged as such and routed to the appropriate persons for handling.
Thanks again for your interest and keep your browser pointed to http://www.cnn.com/.

Sincerely,

CNN Public Information
"CNN, The Most Trusted Name In News"

Saturday, February 17, 2007

Evidence Implicating Dubya in the Libby Trial: CNN Doesn't Cover the Story


How many of you are aware, as of this moment, that George W Bush has been directly implicated in the Libby case with evidence penned from the Dark Lord himself, Dick Cheney? Hear of this yet? Ask yourself; why not?

Less talk. Go here. Check it out. Then meet back here.

Deal is, Cheney names the Pres in a note discussing the vile act of outing an undercover agent to get back at her husband for speaking the Truth against the war lead-up lies and this note remains as evidence. Against the Pres. In a criminal case. Which'd make impeachment a bloody snap. We always knew this thing went high up, folks, and we always knew in our hearts that it went up to at least that creep of creeps, Dick 'Darth' Cheney, but this note indicates that 'the Pres' had his grimy mitts all over it too. Fairly important shit, no?

Worthy of coverage? Absolutely. Being covered? Not at all.

CNN is covering the case daily but I've been waiting for that mamby-pamby Wolf Bullschitzer et al to talk on this extremely important document and nothing at all. It's been introduced to the court, a piece of the case and CNN is actively choosing not to cover it. Fucking criminal. After everything that's happened, after all the lies, all the grime, all the crime, all the time, Dubya still gets a free pass.

Want to know what this translates down to? CNN actually has a reprter on the scene all day every day to 'cover' this story. This piece of mind-numbingly important evidence is introduced in the trial, this 'reporter' calls in this information and somebody at the office decides this is not newsworthy. Or rather, that John Q. Public shouldn't see it. For whatever reason.

Need another reason to join some kind of media reform group and force an independant fourth estate?

All. And I'm bloody sick of this shit.

-iSC

p.p. Cheney could very well go down in the Libby case. And Dubya? Could go down in so many different ways it's crazy. It ain't about crossing your fingers, America, it's about pointing the finger, and it's about making your representatives represent you like they're supposed to.