Your iSenseChange Congressional Election 2006 Headquarters

iSenseChange here, reporting live from the Front Lines of the War on Information on this, the NIGHT OF NIGHTS! It's like a football game out there folks, and at this stage it's still early. The thing to do is to get a few good belts of booze (and whatnot) into you and ride this hoary bitch out to the bitter end, find out what type of world it'll be tomorrow. Right? Cuz that's what's at stake here, nothing less. Some kind of control or counter over this crazed dingus and his madmen puppetmasters OR NONE WHATSOEVER.

“Congress, which once spent an entire year investigating a married man's attempt to cover up an illicit act of oral sex, has shown no curiosity whatsoever about a war that the administration elected to wage that has killed and maimed hundreds of thousands and led our own people to commit war crimes and squandered hundreds of billions of dollars and degenerated into civil war.”
-Garrison Keillor

Say what you will of your Reality TV but give me American Politics any day of the week and thrice on Sundays. Why? Because when you peel back all the lies, dirty lies and outright bullshit (no mean feat, that) what do you have? Greed. Sex. Violence. And more! All those juicy little things that the Reality folks are trying so hard to manufacture on some island somewhere. No sir, I say fuck the island, I’ll take the Great American Bubble!! You?

Be mashing all sorts of Election night ramblings in this space as the news comes in. Make sense of it later, what sense there be.

Big questions: will exit polls mean a goddamned thing? They were fucked up last time, will be fucked up this time. Which means any information coming in right now that is based on exit polls is bloody useless. Exit polls versus end result ends up being the measure of how much cheating there was, remember that one, Citizens. That's a little iSC election equation for you. How's that for cutting edge coverage, eh? Yours, as always, at the cut rate price of six bucks a year!

Smarmy fink, Joe Benedict Lieberman, running as an independent, defeats Democrat Ned Lamont, makes it in by sheer Republican might! Strange days indeed, but maybe not so much for this Dem in name alone. As everybody knows. Will Lieberman flip? If the Repubs need him, he’ll flip. And he’ll make a fortune off it. I’m pretty sure that dude can be bought. That’s if he’s the dirtiest of whores that I suspect him to be. I’ve been calling him Benedict Lieberman for months now, you just remember where you heard that first too, eh kiddies? Damn skippy.

Santorum goes down! Hah! Deserve it. Good riddance. Total jerk. Prototypical Far Right lug. Won’t miss you one bit, you dick. Number three Repub leader in the Senate eats it big time.

At precisely 9:11 (what th-) CNN makes the call that the Dems will be the Majority Party in the House. Did you know that the number 11, in numerology is one of the most powerful numbers? Know why? It is said to represent change...but as I said, CNN bases predictions at least partially on exit polling, which doesn't account for the 'Republican Fix Factor', which translates to outright election robbery.

Having extremely dirty thoughts about Dana Bash, horse-face or no. Where's Paula at? She check out early? Any net nudies of Paula out there? Surprised myself when she popped into my mind during a latenight tug sesh. Gave her a thumb in the bum. And she loved it...

Hey, here's something funny: 947 registered voters in Dagget County, Utah. The funny part? A 2005 census stating a population of 943. That's a 102% voter turnout! Interrrrresting.

All for now. This night is far from over but I'm so drunk I'm nearly blind. Shoulda gone stimulant. Tactical error, Sensey! Shit, man! Ah fuck it, nobody said this was going to be easy.

We are, after all, bloggers.

-iSense

This Election, Not of Theft but Robbery

Because theft is a stealthy thing that happens in the inky pitch of night when noone is around to mark it; you just wake up and it’s gone. This election is hardly that. This one is of robbery, the kind that breaks down your door, laughs maniacally as it takes what’s yours with a mocking whisper of “what’re you gonna do about it, bubba.” Well, what indeed? Me? Oh, you know. Ol’ Sensey’s just tryin’ to Live his Life eight seconds at a time. As per. And keep an eye on this impending mockery of Democracy, throw pebbles at it from a safe distance. Mock it though remain powerless but to watch. It’s my favourite show right now. What’re you watchin’ Citizen? And what’s it about?

And the show I’m watching ain’t about whether the Democrats can take back the house and finally provide some kind of balance against this hideous Far Right orgy of corruption, slack assedness and violence. Sure, it’s in there somewhere but it’s not the main story and it’s not the Real Question. So what is?

And things just keep getting weirder, as promised. Like what? Like the head Religio-Nutcase in the WhiteHouse is nailin’ male hookers and taking meth! What a hoot! It never stops! What, you thought it was gonna stop with KidFucker Foley? Who’s next in this Great Far Right Masquerade of the Grotesque? Haven’t seen any dead hookers yet, but after the drugs and the pedophilia you know they can’t be too far behind, right? You damned skippy. Heard it here first. Nero’s New America is scandal in bulk. Chew on that, bitches. Hah!

And you just know Rummy and Cheney’s got bodies someplace. Right? A swack of them. Whole White House is prob’ly lousy with them. When found will blame on the Democrats. Or the janitor that found them. Or their own sainted Aunt Petunia’s. And probably get away with it. Again. And Bush’ll tell ‘em they’re doing a ‘super’ job or something. Personally, I’d like to see him try ‘stupendous’. Dubya’s coup de grace as far as language butchery.

But the question, Sensey? Surely we all know it, by now? Course you do.

Can they steal enough to hold the house. The only question in this election. The answer? Well…can they?

But you’ll never see it on any set of CNN’s stats or tickers. And the talking heads have precious little to say about it, thus far at least. I want to hear ‘em say this election is getting stolen. Just like the last one. I’m holding out for that fleeting second where a talking head ignores the rules and belts it out there and just like that you have a few seconds of Truth in your media, just like you always, always wanted. Slim chance on that one, not these scabrous whores and cruel villains of the Big Media, the more than wilful manufacturers of Consent and Control and the All Important Maintenance of the Status Quo. Nevertheless, it’s remains the question on everybody’s mind, at least those in the know, by no means the majority.

And can they get away with it? Not such an easy trick these days. The Citizens seem awakened as of late. Yes, they do. Maybe not so much the same citizenry that slept their way into a couple wars and a whole slew of lost Constitutional Rights. Maybe that Citizenry is awakening around this election and remembering that the right things actually kinda sorta matter and deserve something a little bit closer to their FULL FUCKING ATTENTION. One hopes. I hope. The whole world has a stake in this.

Hmmmmmm. Hope. A strange feeling. And around what? Democrats? No. Not them, not at all. The People. It is in that way my Hope lay, always. What do you say?

Right. Intense bullshit pending. You’ve been warned. You’re about to hear a big shitload about Hussein getting the death penalty and that’s Proof Positive of All Things Iraq. How’s that for your November surprise? World safer! Live worldwide coverage of Saddam Hussein’s date with a bullet or twenty! Makes for some great T.V, I can tell you that much! Say what you will about the Conservatives but they certainly know how to put on a fine show. Hey Deorre, who called 'Saddam's head exploding in a crimson mist' as November surprise? Was it Keywoman1? I know I said Osama. Or an Iran bombardment. Did we make a wager on all this? I was drunk. I promise nothing.

Actually, check that. I'm still holding out for a Bay of Tonkin style 'missile strike' from Iran as the big November surprise. See! We're under attack! Been so all along!

Peace Y'all. Out of Iraq and into Selma.

-iSC

p.p. I were running? Abu Graib and Katrina, hit 'em right in the face with it.

RandomMP3age: “Painted Black,” the Rolling Stones

Kidfu*ker Foley and the Shattered Myth of the Republican Moral Authority

“These were the years when the US parliament became a historical punch line, a political obscenity on par with the court of Nero or Caligula - a stable of thieves and perverts who committed crimes rolling out of bed in the morning and did their very best to turn the mighty American empire into a debt-laden, despotic backwater…”

-Matt Taibbi, “Time to Go! Inside the Worst Congress Ever” Rolling Stone Magazine

Say what you like about Monica and the blue dress but at least Clinton liked chicks! Grown up ones! Jesus shuddering Christ! What, on earth IS NEXT from these HIDEOUS FIENDS?!? They made Kidfucker Foley (R) a co-chairman of the House Caucus on MISSING and EXPLOITED CHILDREN, and in time, Republican officials right up to and including J. DENNIS HASTERT (R), the SPEAKER OF THE HOUSE knew precisely what his interests were, knew precisely what he was doing and yet actively CHOSE to DO NOTHING to stop it, let alone bring the sick dick to justice! They let him keep a post that he would INEVITABLY use to his kidfucking advantage! Yes sir, pedophiles around their world rub their palms with envious glee at that one, the quintessential dream post for Kidfuckers like Foley and they LET HIM KEEP THE JOB! Which to me, means they facilitated it, no? Which is aiding and abetting kidfucking, yes? Which means, by proxy, a good swath of the Repubbies are Kidfuckers too! That’s as fucked up as it gets, Citizens. I mean, sure, there’s probably ways you could have equally fucked up your stewardship of the nation and its most vulnerable, but I’m gonna say you can’t possibly surpass it.

An Ugly but Necessary Prediction: there will be more kids. Hate to say it, probably some dead bodies too. Mark my words, though I loathe them. Thing is, the level and universality of Republican crime on the Hill is such that I feel like, well, how can there not be at least a couple ‘a bodies in the mix? They’ve done everything else.

Officially as bad as it gets. Can’t be topped. The culture of corruption that exists in Washington under the Republican dominated Congress, the Executive and Judiciary branches is legendary and of historical significance. The Clinton impropriety is erased, or rather finally exposed for what it really was: utterly meaningless. Bill bust any laws when he fired great loads all over Monica and her little blue dress? Nope. Both were consenting adults. Right? Which means all that bullshit and ballyhoo about a presidential blowjob has finally been ‘put to bed,’ forever. And it’s about goddamned time.

But there’s a vote coming up, some say. Things will change. Yes, things will change, but how much? This is what I said before the last election: with widespread cheating and paper-trail free ballot machines (which only makes sense if it's yer buddies that supply and install the machines) we will have no way of having any idea what the real vote results are. No way of knowing. That was in 2004. Has anything changed since then? Nope. Nothing has. If anything, more controls are in place to ensure that however America decides to vote on Election Day, the Repubbies can generate whatever numbers they wish.

Yes Virginia, I’m saying right now the Repubbies can win whatever they want to in November. Whatever they want to. And a compliant, sleeping populace will allow it just as they did in 2004. Or will they? Has Kidfucker Foley, the Iraq War Lead-up Lies and the utter assault on the Constitution of the United States of America (amongst soooooooo many other things, I mean, c’mon, who has time to list them all?) finally took hold in the minds of the People? Has the threshold been met that converts lemmings back into Citizens? Me, I’m not so sure but hey, by all means, prove me wrong.

Want to not be a lemming? All you can do if you’re an American citizen and living in the US right now is take part in the process. Not only vote but volunteer in the process. And watch EVERYTHING like a MOTHERFUCKING HAWK!!! Register any impropriety by either side and KEEP SHOUTING FROM THE HIGHEST MOUNTAINTOP UNTIL IT'S BEEN ADDRESSED. It's called a class action lawsuit, if needs be, whenever and wherever your Democracy is being tampered with. Your Democracy needs that right now like you need air and I need a strong drink.

Keep your eyes on the skies Citizens, I suspect the November Surprise is an Impending NeoCon Fear Injection. Keep those cell-phone cams at the ready and record everything. EVERYTHING.

Right. All for now.

-iSenseChange

p.p. I am hereby endorsing Barack Obama in 2008 or 2012. If he or someone like him doesn’t get into the WhiteHouse by that time then America is hopelessly doomed, if it ain’t already. More of the same means the utter destruction of America which will probably bring a good chunk of the world with it. Which is why I have to give a fuck. And so should you. Period.

NonRandomMP3age: “Imagine,” a Perfect Circle